Port Times Record

A Walmart customer donates to Stan Feltman’s fundraising efforts for fellow veterans. Photo by Rita J. Egan

Stanley Feltman of Coram, a 2019 TBR News Media Brookhaven Person of the Year and World War II veteran, died Sept. 23. He was 95.

Stan Feltman was a B-29 tail gunner in the United States Army Air Corps.

Feltman was known to many as the veteran who sold poppies at the Middle Island Walmart to raise money for his fellow veterans. Often he would have a shopping cart filled with articles and wartime photos. Some days he would take a break from his regular location and collect money at the Walmart in Centereach or East Setauket.

In a 2019 TBR News Media interview, Feltman said he had met so many generous people through the years. He usually would collect between $80 and $100 after standing there for two hours. One day a gentleman shook his hand and noticed he was cold and bought him a jacket from the store. One woman gave him a $20 bill one day saying it was for him to keep.

“I took the $20, and when she left, I threw it in the pot,” he said. “I don’t need the money.”

A member of the Jewish War Veterans of the USA Col. Mickey Marcus Post 336, Feltman would bring the donations to the post’s monthly meetings where he and his fellow members decided where the money should go. Post Comdr. Norman Weitz said over a few years they have been able to donate more than $21,000 thanks to Feltman’s fundraising efforts. The post is a regular contributor to many veterans causes, including the Long Island State Veterans Home at Stony Brook University.

“My father was more proud of what he did with selling poppies for the veterans than anything he did in the war,” his son Richard said in a recent phone interview. “That was to him most important — selling poppies was his lifeline.”

His son said he and his brother Scott were proud of his father not only because he was a WW II vet but also because he gave back to other veterans.

“The fact that he was giving back to other veterans who might need help and providing them money to be able to give them things that they may have needed — especially those vets coming back from the War on Terrorism and not necessarily getting what World War II vets got when they returned — I couldn’t be happier with my father,” Richard Feltman said.

Stanley Feltman, who was born April 5, 1926, in Flatbush, Brooklyn, was a B-29 tail gunner and double ace in the U.S. Army Air Corps, which he joined after he graduated from high school in 1944. Feltman one time after being shot down had to escape on a raft. When a fellow soldier slipped off the raft into shark-infested waters, Feltman dove down to save him and grabbed him by the collar. Feltman earned the Bronze Star Medal for saving the man’s life. The medal wasn’t the only one earned during his service, as he gained more medals in total throughout his time in the Air Corps, even though they were no longer in his possession.

Richard Feltman said local elected officials helped the family reissue many of his father’s medals when he was inducted into the Four Chaplains Society in 2020 for the work he had done selling poppies.

During this time in the Army Air Corps, he became an amateur boxer. One day when he was being bullied by another soldier for being Jewish, he punched him. When a drill sergeant witnessed the fight and Feltman’s skill, he encouraged Feltman to take up boxing where he was undefeated. After his time in the service, Feltman went on to become a carpet salesperson.

In addition to raising money for veterans, Feltman participated in lectures at schools and senior groups, including Erasmus Hall High School where he attended while growing up in Brooklyn. He also was interviewed for the Library of Congress Veterans History Project, an initiative established to collect and preserve firsthand remembrances of wartime veterans.

Feltman was predeceased by his wife, Marilyn. He leaves behind his two sons Richard and Scott and five grandchildren. Funeral services were held Sept. 24 at New Montefiore Cemetery in West Babylon.

Jack Hennessy takes control for the Royals in a home game against Greenport Oct 18. Photo by Bill Landon

It was a game that began in brilliant sunshine turned to a driving rain. When the rain stopped, the wind picked up before darkness ended the contest which left Port Jefferson in a 2-2 tie with Greenport Oct. 18. 

Greenport struck first when Ricky Campos scored but Port Jeff’s Daniel Owen evened the score late in the first half. Jonah Plaster was the spark in the second half when he scored the Royals go-ahead goal at the 18-minute mark for a 2-1 lead. Declan Crowley made it a new game when he scored six minutes later. 

As daylight grew short the game went to a 10-minute overtime period without a decision for a 2-2 final in the league VII matchup. Port Jeff junior Jonathan Bosewell had five saves in net.

The Royals conclude their 2021 campaign Oct. 20 with a home game against Smithtown Christian. Game time is four o’clock.

— All photos by Bill Landon

METRO photo

With the holiday season just around the corner, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention urged Americans on Friday to celebrate upcoming holidays by taking basic safety measures against the Covid-19 pandemic that still plagues the nation.

“Holiday traditions are important for families and children. There are several ways to enjoy holiday traditions and protect your health. Because many generations tend to gather to celebrate holidays, the best way to minimize COVID-19 risk and keep your family and friends safer is to get vaccinated if you’re eligible,” the CDC said in a press release.

The CDC recommended the following safer ways to celebrate the holidays:

Generally:

  • Protect those not yet eligible for vaccination such as young children by getting yourself and other eligible people around them vaccinated.
  • Wear well-fitting masks over your nose and mouth if you are in public indoor settings if you are not fully vaccinated.
    • Even those who are fully vaccinated should wear a mask in public indoor settings in communities with substantial to high transmission.
      • Outdoors is safer than indoors.
    • Avoid crowded, poorly ventilated spaces.
    • If you are sick or have symptoms, don’t host or attend a gathering.
    • Get tested if you have symptoms of COVID-19 or have a close contact with someone who has COVID-19.

If you are considering traveling for a holiday or event, visit CDC’s Travel page to help you decide what is best for you and your family. CDC still recommends delaying travel until you are fully vaccinated.

Special considerations:

  • People who have a condition or are taking medications that weaken their immune system may not be fully protected even if they are fully vaccinated and have received an additional dose. They should continue to take all precautions recommended for unvaccinated people, including wearing a well-fitted mask, until advised otherwise by their healthcare provider.
  • You might choose to wear a mask regardless of the level of transmission if a member of your household has a weakened immune system, is at increased risk for severe disease, or is unvaccinated.
  • If you are gathering with a group of people from multiple households and potentially from different parts of the country, you could consider additional precautions (e.g., avoiding crowded indoor spaces before travel, taking a test) in advance of gathering to further reduce risk.
  • Do NOT put a mask on children younger than 2 years old.

“By working together, we can enjoy safer holidays, travel, and protect our own health as well as the health of our family and friends,” said the release.

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The second Bayles Chandlery, left, was destroyed in an 1897 waterfront fire and the Willse-Bayles Homestead, right, was leveled in 1917. Photo by George B. Brainerd; Photo from the Kenneth C. Brady Digital Archive

Professional photographer Arthur S. Greene and amateur photographer John M. Brown are well known for their images of early Port Jefferson, but another talented photographer who also recorded life in Port Jefferson is hardly a household name. 

Unlike Greene who had a studio in Port Jefferson or Brown who besides being a shutterbug was Port Jefferson’s postmaster, photographer George B. Brainerd primarily documented urban Brooklyn.

Razed in June 1965, the Petty Building stood on Port Jefferson’s Main Street and housed the Port Jefferson Times weekly newspaper. Photo by George B. Brainerd; Photo from the Kenneth C. Brady Digital Archive

Renowned for his city scenes, it is often forgotten that Brainerd also photographed the rural landscape on his jaunts throughout Suffolk County including then sleepy Port Jefferson.

Born in 1845, Brainerd attended Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute, worked as a civil engineer, was Brooklyn’s deputy water purveyor from 1869 to 1886, and is considered a pioneer of amateur photography.

Over the course of his trips to Port Jefferson in 1878 and 1879, Brainerd photographed a variety of the village’s buildings — many of which are no longer standing. 

One image shows the Methodist Church, which was later sold at auction, moved from Port Jefferson’s Spring Street to Main Street, converted into a storehouse, and destroyed in a September 1904 blaze.

Another view depicts the office of the Port Jefferson Times. The weekly newspaper was housed on the west side of Port Jefferson’s Main Street in the Petty Building which was razed in June 1965. 

Brainerd’s photo of the north side of Port Jefferson’s East Broadway pictures the second Bayles Chandlery which was destroyed in a July 22, 1897 waterfront fire and the iconic Willse-Bayles Homestead which was leveled in December 1917 to make way for what is now the Port Jefferson Village Center.

Additional images show the Port Jefferson Flour Mill on West Broadway, sold in 1918 and later dismantled; Smith’s Hotel on Main Street, renamed the Ardencraig Inn and lost in a 1920 blaze; and Raynor’s Hotel on East Main Street, commonly known as the Port Jefferson Hotel, demolished in 1949. 

Raynor’s Hotel on Port Jefferson’s East Main Street was demolished in 1949. Photo by George B. Brainerd; Photo from the Kenneth C. Brady Digital Archive

Besides these shots, Brainerd’s panoramic views of Port Jefferson capture the village’s Cedar Hill Cemetery, original railroad station, Emmett B. Darling Shipyard, John R. Mather Lumber Shed, tranquil harbor, inviting streets, and gracious homes. 

Gifted in freezing the Port Jefferson scene for posterity, Brainerd has left us with a treasure, providing an invaluable record of what it was like to live in the village before its suburban development.

Kenneth Brady has served as the Port Jefferson Village Historian and president of the Port Jefferson Conservancy, as well as on the boards of the Suffolk County Historical Society, Greater Port Jefferson Arts Council and Port Jefferson Historical Society. He is a longtime resident of Port Jefferson.

Photo from Butterball
Butterball, LLC, a Mount Olive, N.C. establishment, is recalling approximately 14,107 pounds of ground turkey products that may be contaminated with extraneous materials, specifically blue plastic, the U.S. Department of Agriculture’s Food Safety and Inspection Service (FSIS) announced in a press release Oct. 13.

The ground turkey items were produced on September 28, 2021. The following products are subject to recall:

  • 2.5-lb. trays containing “farm to family BUTTERBALL all natural Ground Turkey” with the case code 50211271, a sell or freeze by date of 10/18/2021, and timestamps from 2123 through 2302 printed on the packaging.
  • 3-lb. tray containing “Kroger GROUND TURKEY” with the case code 50211271, a sell or freeze by date of 10/17/2021, and timestamps from 2314 through 2351 printed on the packaging.

The products subject to recall bear establishment number “EST. P-7345” inside the USDA mark of inspection. These items were shipped to retail locations nationwide.

The problem was discovered when FSIS and the establishment received consumer complaints reporting pieces of blue plastic embedded in raw ground turkey produced by Est. 7345.

There have been no confirmed reports of injuries due to consumption of these products. Anyone concerned about an injury or illness should contact a healthcare provider.

FSIS is concerned that some product may be in consumers’ freezers and/or refrigerators. Consumers who have purchased these products are urged not to consume them. These products should be thrown away or returned to the place of purchase.

FSIS routinely conducts recall effectiveness checks to verify recalling firms notify their customers of the recall and that steps are taken to make certain that the product is no longer available to consumers. When available, the retail distribution list(s) will be posted on the FSIS website at www.fsis.usda.gov/recalls.

Consumers with questions about the recall can contact the Butterball Consumer Hotline at (800) 288-8372. Members of the media with questions about the recall can contact Christa Leupen, PR Manager, Butterball LLC at (919) 255-7598.

Consumers with food safety questions can call the toll-free USDA Meat and Poultry Hotline at 1-888-MPHotline (1-888-674-6854) or live chat via Ask USDA from 10 a.m. to 6 p.m. (Eastern Time) Monday through Friday. Consumers can also browse food safety messages at Ask USDA or send a question via email to [email protected]. For consumers that need to report a problem with a meat, poultry, or egg product, the online Electronic Consumer Complaint Monitoring System can be accessed 24 hours a day at https://foodcomplaint.fsis.usda.gov/eCCF/.

Freddie Freeman of the Atlanta Braves. Wikipedia photo

By Daniel Dunaief

Daniel Dunaief

Before I get to the current difficulty of deciding which of the four remaining baseball teams to support, if any, I’d like to offer the following observations on a bipolar Yankees season, in which a 13-game winning stream seemed as unlikely as a 70 loss season.

The team had the talent, sort of. They are, as the saying goes, what their record says they are. In many ways, it’s remarkable that they even made the one-game wildcard playoff. They weren’t exactly world beaters against the Baltimore Orioles, who almost single handedly made it possible for the other four teams in the division to finish with over 90 wins.

They also gave away games that they seemed a lock to win, coughing up leads late, and losing key games to a Mets team that struggled to find its identity and mojo after the best pitcher on the planet, Jacob deGrom, was injured.

But this isn’t about the Mets. So, for what it’s worth, here are my Yankees thoughts. Stop worrying about how much money you’re paying players. Go with the players that helped you win. That means, if defensively-gifted shortstop Andrew Velazquez played a key role in big games with his range and defense, give him a chance.

If that also means Greg Allen needs a few at bats and a chance to race around the bases, give him a shot, too. Oh, and Tyler Wade? I know he’s not going to hit 400-foot home runs too often, but he is a versatile gamer with an ability to play numerous positions and, on occasion, to have a high contact hot streak.

Stock photo

If I were managing my favorite team, I’d stick with whatever is working and not try to race injured and under performing players back. Sure, Gleyber Torres and Gio Urshela have been valuable pieces in the past, but that’s not a reason to put them back on the field in the hopes that they’ll be something they weren’t before each of them got injured.

As for the current playoff conundrum, what should Yankees fans who are still paying attention to baseball root for during the last three series?

Come on, it’s almost impossible to root for the Red Sox because, well, they’re the Red Sox. Then again, the Astros are not just a baseball villain, but are also Yankee killers. Jose Altuve, who used to be a beloved versoin of the little engine that could, hits a huge home run in 2019 off of Aroldis Chapman then covers up his uniform so no one can rip it off and show a tattoo he didn’t like? Yeah, I’m sure that’s what happened because these players are so modest about their body ink.

One of those two teams will represent the American League in the World Series. If I had to choose one, I think, gulp, I’d go with the Red Sox. Part of the reason for that is that I have so many friends and professional colleagues who love the team that I’d be happy for them.

In the National League, the Braves are a feel good team. I saw Freddie Freeman at the All Star Game a few years ago and he seemed like a genuinely good father. I know that’s not a critical criteria for rooting for someone, but he held his kids and smiled at almost anyone who talked to him.

The Dodgers are the beasts of baseball in the last few years. Just when you think they couldn’t get any better, they add Max Scherzer (seriously?) and Trea Turner, two incredible deadline acquisitions for a team that was already a powerhouse. Mookie Betts is otherworldly in one way or another, with his speed, incredible and accurate arm and his ability to put the ball in play and, at times, over the wall.

I’m going to root for the underdog in the national league here, pulling for the Braves to make a Cinderella journey into the World Series and beat the deep and talented Dodgers.

Now, if I get my way and it’s the Braves against the Red Sox? I’m going to root for the Braves because it’s still the Red Sox. No matter who wins, though, I’m hoping for a seven-game series because that’s good for baseball and for the baseball fan. I know the season is long enough, but those last few games are like the final number in a Broadway musical. The energy is high, the fans are on their feet, and no one wants to leave.

Daniel Tuttle received the therapeutic treatment Intracept for back pain. Photo from Tuttle

Over 30 years as a plumber took its toll on Daniel Tuttle.

Daniel Tuttle, who received the therapeutic treatment Intracept for back pain, enjoys a boat ride. Photo from Tuttle

The 79-year old Northport resident felt daily pain in his lower back, which limited his ability to walk for any length of time.

“I always lifted up [stuff] you shouldn’t lift,” Tuttle said. “It was too heavy. Over the years, I got more and more pain.”

Tuttle visited several specialists. His cardiologist recommended he see Dr. Frank Ocasio, director of Acute Pain Management and chair of Pain Management at Huntington Hospital and the director of North Shore Head and Spine in Huntington.

Ocasio recently started performing a therapeutic treatment called Intracept, which involves cutting a small incision in the back, inserting a tube and providing enough heat to deactivate the nerve that causes chronic lower back pain.

About a month after the procedure, Tuttle is pleased to report that his pain has declined from “an 11” to closer to a three on a daily basis.

Several doctors around Long Island have provided the Intracept procedure, which was developed by Relievant Medsystems, over the last few years, including at Stony Brook University and Port Jefferson’s St. Charles Hospital.

Dr. Jonathan Raanan, assistant professor of Neurosurgery, Physical Medicine & Rehabilitation in the Department of Neurosurgery at the Renaissance School of Medicine at Stony Brook University, has performed about 10 such surgeries over the last few years.

Raanan described such lower back pain that lasts more than six months or a year as being something of a “big black hole” in terms of treatment.

In a magnetic resonance image, the disc becomes darker, indicating it doesn’t have good hydration and that it isn’t an effective shock absorber.

Intracept can help reduce the pain.

“It’s very satisfying when someone comes in who has tried everything but the kitchen sink to treat this” who then says “I do feel better,” Raanan said.

Tuttle’s wife Susan, who has been married to him for over three decades, said the procedure has improved his quality of life.

Susan Tuttle said her husband has been able to “do everything he wanted to do.”

Ocasio found the idea of Intracept appealing, particularly because it was a one-time effort that didn’t require ongoing follow up visits.

“There’s not much out there in the pain management space that’s a non medication, a non-opioid strategy that’s a one and done,” Ocasio said.

The surgery is an outpatient procedure and can take anywhere from 45 minutes to two hours, depending on the area over which the nerve is sending a repeated pain signal.

Patients either receive mild sedation or are under general anesthesia.

“People see results within weeks,” Ocasio said. In some cases, they can get relief within 24 hours.

Dr. Frank Ocasio recently began to perform the therapeutic treatment. Photo from Ocasio

To be sure, the procedure, as with any, involves some level of risk and isn’t appropriate for everyone.

Raanan advised potential patients to discuss the risks and benefits with any provider.

Starting in January, Intracept will have a Current Procedural Terminology, or CPT, code, which will give health care providers a standard way to describe the procedure and insurance companies a way of determining patient eligibility.

Until then, patients need to appeal to indicate to insurance companies what other treatments they’ve had for back pain.

In Raanan’s experience, patients sometimes have flare-ups of other pain that is similar to sciatic discomfort after the treatment for days or even weeks after Intracept.

“That might be a reasonable trade-off in the eyes of the patient,” Raanan added.

Deadening the nerve doesn’t cause any loss of control of motor function, Ocasio said, as the nerve provides a sensory benefit while others provide necessary muscle control.

“You still have multiple nerves around that area,” Ocasio added.

Candidates for this procedure typically have lower back pain associated with activities that require bending forward, like loading a dishwasher or flexing at the waist, Ocasio described.

Ocasio said doctors who perform Intracept receive training under guidance from the company.

Patients interested in this approach are anywhere from their 30s through their late 70s, local doctors said.

For Daniel Tuttle, the procedure provided relief.

“He’s outside, puttering around, doing the things that make him happy,” Susan
Tuttle said.

“It gave me my lifestyle back,” Daniel Tuttle said.

The Tuttles are planning a trip to Italy next summer.

Raanan cautioned that, for at least one patient, the relief led to another problem.

A female patient returned to working out in the gym, where she exercised so vigorously that she created a different spine injury that he treated.

“When patients feel better, they have to remember they are still vulnerable,” Raanan said. “Poor mechanics, postures, flexibility or excessive and prolonged activity come with some risk.”

David Thanassi. Photo by Jeanne Neville
*Please note: This article was updated on Oct. 15 to include a reference to former President Bill Clinton (D) in the fifth paragraph.

By Daniel Dunaief

David Thanassi wants to give dangerous bacteria in the kidney a haircut.

No, not exactly, but Thanassi, Zhang Family Professor and Chair of the Department of Microbiology and Immunology at the Renaissance School of Medicine at Stony Brook University, has studied how hair-like structures called P pili in the bacteria Escherichia coli are assembled on the bacterial surface. 

These pili allow bacteria to hang on to the walls of the kidney, where urine would otherwise flush them out.

Learning about pili at different stages of development could provide a way to keep them from attaching themselves to the kidney and from entering the bloodstream, which could lead to the potentially lethal problem of bacterial sepsis. Indeed, this week, former President Bill Clinton (D) checked into the intensive care unit at the University of California Irvine Medical Center after a urinary tract infection spread to his bloodstream.

“We have been looking at this as a really important aspect of initiating infection from a bacteria’s point of view,” Thanassi said. “How do they build these structures” that lead to infection and illness?

Recently, Thanassi published the structure of these pili in the journal Nature Communication.

The current work builds on previous efforts from Thanassi to determine the structure of these pili in the bladder. He has been exploring how the thousands of proteins that make up the pili get transported and assembled in the correct order. “If we can understand that aspect, we can disrupt their assembly or function,” he said.

Urinary tract infections are a major infectious disease, particularly for women. Indeed, about half of all women will have at least one urinary tract infection, which can be uncomfortable and can require some form of medication. 

In some cases, the infections can be recurrent, leading to frequent infections and the repeated need for antibiotics.

The bacteria that cause these infections can become resistant to antibiotics, increasing the importance of finding alternative approaches to these infections, such as interfering with pili.

To be sure, the solution to reducing the bacteria’s ability to colonize the kidney or urinary tract would likely require other steps, as these invaders have additional ways beyond the pili to colonize these organs. Nonetheless, disrupting the way they adhere to the kidney could be a constructive advance that could lead to improved infection prevention and treatment.

One likely strategy could involve using an anti-pilus treatment in combination with other antibiotics, Thanassi explained.

For people who have recurrent infections, anti-pilus therapeutics could offer a solution without resorting to long-term antibiotics.

In his lab, Thanassi is interested in small molecules or chemicals that would disrupt the early stage in pili assembly. “We think of these as protein-protein interactions that are required to build these” pili, he said.

By using a fluorescence reporter, Thanassi and his colleagues can screen libraries of chemicals to determine what might inhibit the process.

As with many biological systems, numerous compounds may seem appropriate for the job, but might not work, as medicine often requires a specific molecule that functions within the context of the dynamic of a living system.

For the helpful bacteria in the gut, pili are not as important as they are for the harmful ones in the kidney, which could mean that an approach that blocked the formation of these structures may not have the same intestinal and stomach side effects as some antibiotics.

To determine the way these pili develop structurally, Thanassi and his lab used molecular and biochemical techniques to stop the assembly of pili at specific stages.

Bacteria assemble these pili during the course of about 30 minutes. An usher proteins serves as the pilus assembly site and pilus secretion channel in the bacterial outer membrane. The usher acts as a nanomachine, putting the pilus proteins into their proper order. A chaperone protein brings the pilus subunits to the usher protein.

In their development, the pili require a protein channel, which is an assembly site.

Thanassi started by working on the usher protein in isolation. The usher proteins function to assemble the thousands of pilus subunits that make up each pilus fiber. The process also involves chaperone proteins, which bind to nascent subunit proteins and help the subunits fold. The chaperone then delivers the subunit proteins to the usher for assembly into the pilus fiber. He used molecular and biochemical methods to express and purify the usher protein.

The assembly process involves interactions between chaperone-subunit complexes and the usher. Over the years, Thanassi has determined how the different proteins work together to build and secrete a pilus.

He was able to force the bacteria to express only one version of the assembly step and then isolate that developmental process.

The majority of the pilus is like a spring or a coil, which can stretch and become longer and straighter to act as a shock absorber, allowing the bacteria to grab on to the kidney cells rather than breaking.

Other researchers are studying how they might make the pili more brittle, preventing that spring-like action from working and compromising its ability to function.

“We’re trying to prevent the pili from assembling in the first place,” Thanassi explained. “Our approach is to try and get molecules that prevent the interaction from occurring.” He is looking at the specific function of one molecule that prevents the usher assembly platform from developing properly, which would wipe out the assembly site.

Thanassi credits former Stony Brook Professor Huilin Li, who is now Chair in the Department of Structural Biology at the Van Andel Institute in Grand Rapids, Michigan, with providing structural insights from his work with the cryo-electron microscoipe. The technology has “revolutionized the work we do,” said Thanassi.

Residents of Smithtown, Thanassi and his wife Kate Kaming, who is Senior Director of Cancer Development at Northwell Health Foundation, have two children. Joseph, 22, attends Northeastern University. Miles, 20, is studying at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology.

Thanassi grew up in South Burlington, Vermont and is an avid skier. He also enjoys mountain biking, walking and music.

Thanassi hopes this latest structural work may one day offer help either with the prevention of infections or with their treatment.

Pixabay photo

By Daniel Dunaief

Daniel Dunaief

What do you name after the man who’s already named everything after himself?

That is the question people will grapple with when they consider how to deploy the name of the 45th president.

Did you know, apart from edifices and casinos, the Trump name has been added to a species of small moth with yellowish-white scales on its head, called the Neopalpa donaltrumpi? Additionally, a sea urchin fossil is called Tetragramma donaldtrumpi.

What should be in the running to honor the legacy of a man who may extend his presidential legacy in 2024?

Here are a few suggestions that, hopefully, will delight and alienate people on both sides of the aisle equally.

— A pizza slicer. Called the Trump, this great divider will cut a pie into two pieces, elevating the one on the right while crushing the one on the left into a mess of tomato sauce and crumbled cheese that wants to tax the rich.

— A board game. With a rotating cast of characters, the object of the Trump Cabinet Shuffle will be for each player to hold onto as many cabinet members for as long as possible, even as many of them either want to leave or write books about their experience.

— A remote control. The former president clearly found TV a relevant and important medium. People around the country could search their couches for the “Trump,” so they can change the channel to watch Fox News, which will provide the names for the Trump Cabinet Shuffle.

— The Trump label maker. Borrowing from an episode of “Seinfeld,” people could develop a label maker named after someone who was fond of naming people and objects. The Trump label maker would default to the most common words in the Trump vernacular, including “disgrace,” “beautiful,” and “fake.”

— A fast-food franchise. Given the former president’s predilection for the fast food he served to college football players, it’s surprising no one has come up with Trump World Burgers. Each restaurant could have a game of darts, where patrons could sling darts at the faces or names of their least favorite democrats. Every wall would have a TV tuned to Fox News and every place setting would sit on top of the New York Post.

—A magic wand. Can’t you picture it? Let’s get out the Trump wand and make everything unpleasant — impeachments, investigations, and distasteful stories- disappear.

— A fertilizer company. Yeah, okay, this might seem especially harsh, but fertilizer, while it’s made from feces, is necessary for the growth of many of the foods we eat, whether we’re vegetarians and eat only greens, or carnivores and eat the meat that eats the greens.

— Oversized boxing gloves. With pictures of the former president on each hand, a boxer could put his small, medium or large hands into red Trumps to fight against the forces of evil.

— An especially tall straw pole next to a smaller pole. The taller Trump pole could show how, even at a distance, he’s leading his closest competitor. “Trump is always ahead at the polls.”

— A distorted mirror. Like the side view mirrors on cars, these Trump mirrors could accent certain features while minimizing others, creating whatever reality the viewer prefers.

— Stiff-legged pants. With material that stiffens during the playing of the National Anthem, the Trump pants would make it impossible to kneel.

— A huggable flag. Given his preference for hugging flags, someone should design a flag with arms that hug back, as in, “the Trump flag is ready for its hug.”

— A “yes” puppy. You know how people have little puppies whose heads pop up and down when you touch them on their dashboard? Someone could add a sound effect to that, like “yes, yes, yes, yes,” each time the Trump head moved.

Pixabay photo

By Leah S. Dunaief

Leah Dunaief

Who typically thinks about inflation?

Inflation is one of those words that cuts both ways. Low inflation is considered a desirable thing by borrowers and the Federal Reserve. A lot of inflation can be a disaster for the financial markets and for everyone’s pocketbook. 

Those who deal with money and work in finance keep an eye on inflation. After all, inflation refers to a general increase in the price of goods and services in the economy over time that corresponds with a decrease in what you can buy with the same amount of money. And if your money is going to be devalued, best keep that eye. 

Years ago, I learned a simple definition for inflation: too many dollars chasing too few goods. Because of disruptions in the supply of goods, demand has currently outstripped supply. You can tell that from some of the empty shelves at the stores. Consequently, when products or services are scarce, we pay more for what we can still get.

When that happens suddenly, we all pay attention to inflation. Pull up at the gas pump and fill your tank. What do you know? The price for the exact same gas that you used last month has gone up. Go into a restaurant and order your favorite dish. It now costs a little more. The proprietor has no choice but to charge more because he or she had to pay more for the ingredients, due to disruption in delivery. That’s inflation. The government tracks inflation with the Consumer Price Index, or CPI. They leave gas and food out of the Core Index because those tend to be more volatile from one month to the next. But we can’t leave them out. We have to pay for them.

So how are we doing with inflation now?

Initially, rising prices were thought of as transitory, the result of pent-up demand that was suddenly released with the drop in COVID cases and the increase in vaccinations, that would even itself out before long. But prices of goods and services are still up while supply continues to be disrupted. Additionally, people have had more money to spend on those goods and services as a result of the billions in government aid.

As of this week, the CPI was up 5.4%. That’s how much prices have increased in a year. This is well above the Fed’s targeted rate of two percent, but so far there seems little interest on their part to raise rates and slow inflation. Social security checks, which are intended to keep pace with inflation, will be up 5.9% next year, the most in four decades. When rates are raised, it costs more money to borrow, whether for business expansion or mortgages, and that works to slow down inflation and growth. It seems the Fed still believes present inflation will diminish when current disruptions fade. President Joe Biden (D) has announced plans to keep ports open 24/7 to try and ameliorate the supply delays. But trucks and truckers are also insufficient.

There are other, less obvious signs of inflation. I attended the New York Press Conference two weeks ago and stayed for three nights at a hotel in the center of Troy. For the same room rate, we had no room service, no one cleaned the bathroom or made the beds. Clean towels were left in a bag outside our door. Breakfast was included, but there was only coffee, some wrapped Danish and small containers of yogurt. When we asked for bread, we were told there had been no delivery for many days. So in essence, we were paying the same money but getting less, like the old trick of getting candy for the usual price but in a smaller box. That’s inflation, too.

What actions should we take?

We probably should do our holiday shopping now, while some of the gifts we want are still available and at current prices. We might want to nail down a mortgage rate soon if we are in the market. As for our investments, who ever knows?