Port Times Record

METRO photo

By Leah S. Dunaief

Leah Dunaief

One of the first things we noticed when we moved from the Bronx to Wichita Falls Texas, where my husband reported for duty on the Air Force base in July 1967, was that the city had no delis. Really, no delis. “Where can we find a deli?” we asked people. “What’s a deli?” was the response.

It was then that we learned that a deli, short for delicatessen, was indigenous to large urban settings generally found on the coasts, that made fresh sandwiches and sold side salads from their display cases and bottled sodas from their glass-front, vertical refrigerators. We explained that they were mighty convenient for a quick take-out lunch. Sometimes a few people ate at the handful of tables, but mostly it was an in-and-out experience and one hoped the line would not be too long. “We have diners,” they offered helpfully. “You could probably take out an order from one of them.”

How to describe the difference between a diner and a deli? I had never thought about delis before. I just knew there was one every couple of blocks in New York. Some of them were quite elegant, with imported products, cured meats and cheeses, and even exotic foods, while others, in the neighborhoods, just sold the usual turkey, bologna or ham and Swiss on a roll or white bread.

Ah, but then there were the kosher delis, the ones with overstuffed pastrami on rye and spicy mustard, with a pickle and a soda, maybe even a potato knish on the side. That’s the classic New York deli sandwich. They were the best, and there were fewer of those but enough to feed the discriminating in all five boroughs. Often kosher delis were part of a restaurant in which diners could sit at tables and be served by wise-cracking waiters. Patrons might slurp up chicken soup before they attacked their fulsome sandwiches.

In fact, there were 1500 kosher delicatessens in New York City in the 1930s, brought here primarily by German-Jewish immigrants in the late 19th century. There were fewer than 15 as of 2015, and I’ll bet there are only a handful today. This is how they started, or so the story goes.

A Lithuanian named Sussman Volk, who arrived in New York in 1880, owned a butcher shop on the lower East Side. He befriended another immigrant, from Romania, and allowed the fellow to store his meat in the shop’s large icebox. To thank him, the friend gave Volk a recipe for pastrami, which then proved so popular with Volk’s customers that he opened a restaurant at 88 Delancey Street and served the meat on rye. The creation was soon repeated in delis and became the city’s iconic sandwich.

Delicatessens originated in Germany during the 18th century, started by a German food company called Dellmayr in 1700 that still exists, and spread to the United States in mid-19th century. They catered to the German immigrants, offering smoked meats, sausages, pickled vegetables, dips, breads and olives. Just in case you are on “Jeopardy!”, the root of the word comes from the Latin, “delicatus,” meaning giving pleasure, delightful, pleasing. After WWII, from about 1948 on, they were simply referred to as “delis.”

Today, even supermarkets have deli sections. There are two delis within walking distance in my village and more up and down the neighboring villages. And they exist in many countries with slight variations on the theme. Australia, Canada, Europe (Milan, Paris, Vienna, London, Munich, Zurich), Ireland, they all have delis. They are different from Subway or Jersey Mike’s, or Wawa, which, too, make sandwiches to order. They are also different from McDonald’s or Wendy’s, who specialize in fast food. Some of them have hot prepared foods as well, and all of them require interaction with a clerk behind the counter as opposed to a more digital ordering process. Those clerks may whip up an egg on a roll with bacon and cheese if you ask. Some delis even have small groceries attached to them.

Delis are generally unpretentious eateries that welcome you. For my lunch tastes, you can’t spell delicious without “deli.”

The following incidents have been reported by the Suffolk County Police:

Centereach

■ Walmart on Middle Country Road in Centereach reported a shoplifter on April 5. A man allegedly stole a 55 inch TLC 4k Smart TV worth $319.

Centerport

■ A resident on Ridgefield Road in Centerport reported that someone entered their unlocked vehicle on April 8 and removed a laptop, two iPads and a backpack. The stolen items were valued at over $2,000.

■ A resident on Lone Oak Drive in Centerport reported that someone entered their unlocked vehicle on April 8 and stole a wallet containing cash and credit cards.

Commack

■ Home Depot on Crooked Hill Road in Commack reported a shoplifter on April 8. A man allegedly stole BX copper wire valued at $838.

Dix Hills

■ A 2003 Dodge Ram 1500 containing miscellaneous tools, speakers and sunglasses was stolen from a residence on Deer Park Avenue in Dix Hills on April 7. The vehicle was valued at $6,000.

East Setauket

■ Setauket Gourmet Deli on Route 25A in East Setauket was burglarized on April 7. Unknown suspects entered through the roof and stole cash, two metal safes and a DVR.

Halesite

■ Three Dell laptops were stolen from an unlocked vehicle parked on Baywood Place in Halesite on April 7.

Head of the Harbor

■ A resident on Muffins Meadow Road in Head of the Harbor called the police on April 6 to report that someone entered their unlocked vehicle and stole cash and credit cards.

Huntington

■ A 2019 Mercedes Benz G43 was stolen from a residence on Cove Road in Huntington on April 6. The vehicle was valued at $49,000.

Huntington Station

■ Target on East Jericho Turnpike called the police on April 4 to report that two women allegedly stole assorted health and beauty products valued at $1377.

Lake Grove

■ Dick’s Sporting Goods at the Smith Haven Mall in Lake Grove reported a shoplifter on April 6. A man allegedly stole four TaylorMade golf clubs valued at $2,550.

■ Macy’s at the Smith Haven Mall in Lake Grove called the police on April 9 to report that a person entered the store and allegedly stole miscellaneous clothing items worth $230.

Rocky Point

■ Kohl’s on Route 25A in Rocky Point reported a shoplifter on April 5. A woman allegedly stole assorted clothing items valued at $557.

■ Kohl’s on Route 25A in Rocky Point called the police on April 8 to report a man allegedly stole a vacuum worth $217 from the store.

Port Jefferson Station

■ A resident on Viceroy Place in Port Jefferson Station called the police to report that his 2016 Dodge Charger was stolen with the keys inside in front of his home on April 6. The vehicle was valued at $10,000.

Selden

■ CVS on Middle Country Road in Selden reported at shoplifter on April 7. A woman allegedly stole 6 boxes of diapers worth $210 and bath items worth $30.

■ A petit larceny was reported at Home Depot on Middle Country Road in Selden on April 7. A man allegedly stole a Dewalt table saw worth $640.

■ Home Depot on Middle Country Road in Selden reported a shoplifter on April 8. A woman allegedly placed 40 GFI outlets and one light fixture in her shopping cart and walked out without paying. The merchandise was valued at $2,000.

Stony Brook

■ A 2017 Mercedes B Model G30 was reported stolen from the driveway of a residence on Spencer Lane in Stony Brook on April 2. The vehicle was valued at $50,000.

Suffolk County Crime Stoppers offers a cash reward for information that leads to an arrest. Anyone with information about these incidents can contact Suffolk County Crime Stoppers to submit an anonymous tip by calling 1-800-220-TIPS.

— COMPILED BY HEIDI SUTTON

The Selden campus of Suffolk County Community College. File photo

Last week, Suffolk County Community College officially inaugurated Edward Bonahue as its seventh president.

During his inaugural address, Bonahue emphasized the importance of offering quality higher education at an affordable cost. The staff of TBR News Media energetically supports this message.

Often flying under the radar, two-year institutions do some of the most important work throughout the county and the nation. These institutions are the bridge for some people who have been historically left behind by the education system. At a time when the cost of higher education is skyrocketing out of control, when the decision to take out a student loan is comparable to taking out a mortgage, when fewer people see the value of a college degree, community colleges provide families a common-sense alternative.

Residents of Suffolk County should know that the decisions one makes coming out of high school can have enormous long-term consequences. For many, taking out a five-figure mandatory loan before the age of 20 is simply unwise, and for others can be a catastrophic mistake. Some 18-year-olds simply lack the prudence to make a financial decision of that magnitude.

Coupled with inflation and volatility in the market, more than ever parents must do the difficult work of calculating whether sending their children off to an expensive four-year institution is in their best interest. How can one know for sure that a high school student will comfortably adapt to life at the university? How can anyone predict the long-term academic success of someone who has only known a sheltered life on Long Island? Nowadays, sending even one child off to college disrupts the entire family budget dramatically.

To the residents of Suffolk County, to the parents and students who may be uncertain about whether or not college is the right choice, understand there are alternatives. Community colleges, such as SCCC, are a valuable resource that more Suffolk families should tap into.

Community colleges are a stepping stone. They allow students to determine for themselves if they are college-ready. For those who thrive at the community college, the pricey four-year institution may be a reasonable next step. However, for those who learn that they either struggle in a college setting or are dissatisfied by the work of the academy, the reasonable tuition of the community college makes it easier and less painful to cut one’s losses.

Community college should be a testing ground for student fence-sitters, those uncertain about which path is right for them. For many, community college will propel them to other institutions of higher learning. For others, it will likely point them in the direction of other — often more profitable — career alternatives.

The TBR staff congratulates President Bonahue on his recent inauguration. We hope that with his leadership, Suffolk residents will build trust in our county’s more affordable college institutions. From SCCC to Stony Brook University — both institutions that offer generous tuition rates for in-state residents — people here do have the option to receive a quality college education at an affordable price. Some people should choose this path to reduce the overall cost of their education.

TAKE ON ME Relive the 1980's with a movie about the boy band a-ha at Theatre Three in Port Jefferson on April 18 at 7 p.m., part of the award-winning Port Jefferson Documentary Series spring line-up. Photo from PJDS

The Port Jefferson Documentary Series continues its Spring season with a screening of ‘A-HA: THE MOVIE’ at Theatre Three, 412 Main Street, Port Jefferson on April 18 at 7 p.m.

The music of Queen and the Velvet Underground instilled a sense of destiny in three teenagers living in a small town in 1970s Norway. That dream led to A-ha: the synth-pop trio featuring keyboardist Magne Furuholmen, vocalist Morten Harket, and guitarist Pål Waktaar-Savoy who burst onto the international scene with 1985’s “Take on Me,” buoyed by an iconic sketch-animation video by Irish-British director Steve Barron.

The band became global sensations and heartthrobs overnight, but it remained to be seen how they would adapt to their newfound fame. How would they follow their original dream: to make music? Featuring new interviews with the band and previously unreleased behind-the-scenes footage, A-HA, THE MOVIE delves into this very question. By following the band’s ups and downs—sojourns to post-punk-era England, their James Bond theme song for The Living Daylights thriller, and slow-simmering interpersonal rifts—Robsahm captures a band that constantly strove to challenge itself, never content to simply repeat earlier successes. The result is a moving story of creative intuition and invention.

Preceded by a special concert with singer-songwriter Bryan Gallo who will perform a curated set of Rock, Pop and New Wave Classics from the 1980’s at 6 p.m. and followed by a Q&A via Zoom with Director Thomas Robsahm. Tickets are $10 per person. Advance tiickets are available until April 18 at 6 p.m. at: portjeffdocumentaryseries.com/ticketsvenues or at the door cash only.

 

 

Pixabay photo

By Joan Nickeson

Inspired by the beautification of Dutch parks filled with daffodil blooms, Old Town Blooms and the Port Jefferson Station/Terryville Chamber of Commerce are hosting the second annual Daffodil Dash. This hybrid event includes a virtual 5k and 10k, taking place now through the end of April.

The 1k Daffodil Dash fun run/walk/wheel has an in-person option with three trips around the Chamber Train Car Park on Saturday, April 23. Arrive at 9 a.m. for a 9:30 a.m. start. Virtual participants can upload their race times and photos as of April 16. The first 100 registrants receive a t-shirt and a Bloomer Buff. All race participants receive a Daffodil Dash medal. Profits go to community beautification by Old Town Blooms, and the Chamber Flag Fund.

April 23rd was chosen for the 1k Fun Run to commemorate both Earth Day and Arbor Day. Sunburst Tree Experts will be giving away tree saplings to the first 100 attendees this day. There will be also be free bicycle inspections and a shred event from 9 a.m. to 1 p.m.

Sponsors also include Bass Electric, Buttercup’s Dairy, Christmas Decor, Coach Realty, Emerald Magic Lawn Care, Flushing Bank, Got Poison Ivy, Old Town Blooms, Suffolk Legislator Kara Hahn, Port Jefferson Physical Therapy, Sunburst Tree Experts, Team Perrone Realty, and TREK. The Chamber Train Car Park is located at the intersection of NYS Rte 112/Rte 347/Canal Road. Entrance is on Rose Avenue in Port Jefferson Station. For more information or to register, visit events.elitefeats.com/22daffodil or www.pjstchamber.com. Joan

Joan Nickeson is an active member of the PJS/Terryville community and community liaison to the PJS/T Chamber of Commerce.

Bonahue, above, entering the inaugural ceremony at the Suffolk Federal Credit Union Arena on the Michael J. Grant Campus in Brentwood. Photo by SCCC

On Friday, April 8, Suffolk County Community College celebrated the inauguration of Edward Bonahue as the college’s seventh president. 

Bonahue, who took office in June 2021, was joined by students, educators, community leaders and public officials at the Suffolk Federal Credit Union Arena on the Michael J. Grant Campus in Brentwood. During the event, various speakers had an opportunity to share their respective visions for the community college under Bonahue’s direction. 

Sarah Kain Gutowski, a professor of English at SCCC, delivered the inaugural poem, “A Shared Relief.” Gutowski’s poem reflected upon the setbacks faced by the Suffolk community because of the pandemic and offered a message of reassurance and hope.

“Perhaps memory serves us best when it reveals this: That after the onslaught of illness, fear, isolation and doubt, privation and poverty, empty rhetoric and tenuous polity, something remains,” Gutowski said. “Being together again, communing in this space whether virtual or real, masked or unmasked, standing six feet apart or three, is the way to recovery. Our eyes reflecting shared relief, it says, ‘Good, you’re still here.’”

Among the group of inaugural speakers was Suffolk County Executive Steve Bellone (D), who commended Bonahue for his leadership qualities and for his unique ability to generate partnerships throughout the community.

Suffolk County Executive Steve Bellone, above, spoke during the inauguration. Photo by SCCC

“We are fortunate now to have a seasoned higher education executive with more than 20 years of experience in community college education leading this great institution,” Bellone said. “If the last 10 months tell us anything, it’s that Dr. Bonahue is a proven leader. Throughout the course of his career, he has successfully implemented creative programs and creative, innovative partnerships.” The county executive added that these are “all talents he has brought with him to his role as our new president.”

Bellone also touched upon Bonahue’s local roots, which he considered vital for the continued connection between residents and the community college: “Dr. Bonahue not only has the experience and know-how to lead this incredible institution, but we know he has a special interest in seeing this region succeed as a native Suffolk County resident and graduate of Ward Melville High School.”

Edward Bonahue (left) and County Executive Steve Bellone (right) share a laugh during the inaugural ceremony. Photo by SCCC

Mary Reid, member of the SCCC Foundation Board of Directors and a tax preparer based in Bay Shore, said Bonahue had met with over 100 community representatives from various organizations throughout the county in September 2021. Since that initial meeting, Bonahue has already strengthened the ties between SCCC and its community partners.

“Dr. Bonahue, you and your staff have kept in contact and have begun to implement the suggestions offered that morning,” Reid said. “You have interacted with library directors, with superintendents of schools, labor leaders, civic groups, religious leaders and mothers wanting to attend college who were seeking day care and financial aid,” adding, “We thank you so much for that.”

Reid said jokingly, “Anyone who knows me knows that I cannot leave without asking for something.” Addressing Bonahue, she said, “Today I ask you to add to your to-do list a program that will meet the needs of persons with disabilities, especially those with Down syndrome,” adding, “Also remember to engage in frequent updates to the community groups.”

Representing the student body was Zachary Frost. He celebrated the appointment of Bonahue as president, arguing that Bonahue intends to bring quality higher education opportunities to low-income families throughout the county.

“The first time I met President Bonahue, we spoke about the many resources made available to students to ensure their success,” Frost said. “President Bonahue wanted to streamline access to these resources and make them more readily available to any student who may be struggling. It was in this meeting that I saw President Bonahue’s passion for driving success, especially for those at a disadvantage.” 

Frost described the challenges of growing up in a single-parent household and of being raised by a parent who struggled to make ends meet. “I remember as a young child, probably six or seven years old, my mother didn’t have the easiest time going through college, whether it be financially or her trying to find someone to watch me while she was in class,” he said. “I can’t help but wonder, had she been a student here at Suffolk County Community College and had access to all of these amazing resources, like our food pantry, writing centers, hardship funds and on-campus day care centers, accompanied by caring professors and a great faculty, she probably would have had a much healthier college experience.” 

Dr. Bonahue, on behalf of our three bargaining units, the Faculty Association, AME, the Guild of Administrative Officers, and the executive leadership team, we welcome you, we welcome your family, to our community.

— Dante Morelli

Representing the SCCC employees and the Suffolk County Association of Municipal Employees was Dante Morelli, professor of communications. He said AME union members are the engine behind the entire operation at SCCC’s campuses and downtown centers.

“President Bonahue, I’m going to let you in on a little secret that you probably already know,” Morelli said. “If you really want to know who keeps the college running, it’s the members of AME. It’s the members of AME who are often the first voice and/or a face a student sees or hears when they walk onto campus or pick up the phone to ask for assistance.” He added, “Dr. Bonahue, on behalf of our three bargaining units, the Faculty Association, AME, the Guild of Administrative Officers, and the executive leadership team, we welcome you, we welcome your family, to our community.”

To access our coverage of Bonahue’s inaugural address, click here.

Last Friday, April 8, Edward Bonahue was sworn in as the seventh president of Suffolk County Community College. 

During his inaugural address, Bonahue outlined his vision of higher education in Suffolk County and the direction he intends to steer the college throughout his tenure as president.

“It is a career-defining honor to stand with you today and to accept the deep privilege and tremendous responsibility of serving as the seventh president of Suffolk County Community College,” he said. “For this Long Island boy, the child of, and also brother to, lifelong Suffolk County educators, the opportunity to join with all of you in service to Suffolk County is a dream come true and a prayer answered.”

We honor and commend the work performed by generations of caring college employees, faculty and staff who could choose to do anything, who could choose to work anywhere, but who have chosen this work.”

— Edward Bonahue

A place in history

Bonahue detailed the history of SCCC since the time when it was founded in 1959 as just a small college of about 500 students. Back then, classrooms had to be borrowed from Sachem and Riverhead high schools. The president likened the population growth of Suffolk County with the development and advancement of the community college.

“Those first students came from a growing county with about 600,000 residents,” he said. “Today, Suffolk County is home to over 1.6 million residents, representing a far-more diverse population, and our annual college enrollment exceeds 20,000 students.” He continued by saying, “We honor and commend the work performed by generations of caring college employees, faculty and staff who could choose to do anything, who could choose to work anywhere, but who have chosen this work, to work here and to embrace this mission of fostering student development, promoting a culture of lifelong learning, and ultimately serving the community we live in.”

Reflecting upon the resiliency of the campus community during the COVID-19 pandemic, Bonahue said that the college found new and innovative ways to continue the educational process through virtual learning. In a time of profound uncertainty and despair, he said SCCC did not shrink away from its academic mission.

“Especially in the early days of the pandemic, many of us worked around the clock just to manage a virtual continuity of operations,” he said. “We all learned that our community college students were often those most likely to have been impacted by the pandemic.” Discussing ways students and staff responded, Bonahue added, “We worked with a sense of urgency, but also pragmatic flexibility, knowing that our students’ progress, sometimes even their well-being, rested on our ability to adapt to constantly shifting conditions.”

Meeting the community’s needs

We own that the work of education is complicated, but the college embraces this as a critical duty.”

— Edward Bonahue

During the address, Bonahue articulated the important role that SCCC plays within the Suffolk community. He said the institution’s mission is to provide quality, affordable higher education and to promote health and prosperity throughout the county.

“We know that we are a critical part of the formula for supporting our community and changing students’ lives,” Bonahue said. “Specifically, the essential mission of our college, the necessity of providing an affordable, inclusive education, of providing a pathway of opportunity, has never been more critical.” He added, “For all of Suffolk County, I have this simple message: Suffolk County Community College is Long Island’s own pathway to educational and economic success.”

Bonahue considers an educated populace necessary for community wellness. “We own that the work of education is complicated, but the college embraces this as a critical duty because we know that an educated population is an essential good for our society and our nation.”

The president suggests that democracy also requires an engaged citizenry. He said one of the priorities of the college is to keep its students informed and involved in the democratic process.

“One of our commitments to students is to foster a sense of citizenship and civic engagement,” he said. “We acknowledge that teaching about the rights of democracy, its many individual freedoms, the privilege of self-determination, must also be accompanied by teaching about the responsibilities of citizenship, including service to the community and the country, the rule of law, appreciation for the power of diversity, and the willingness to speak and act in defense of our freedoms.” He stressed, “This kind of general education for all students is critical because through it, students come to understand not only the rights and responsibilities of being an American, but also a sense of the world they live in.”

The students’ experience is the reality of the college.”— Edward Bonahue

Serving all students

Bonahue delivered his general vision for the college. He affirmed the college “will continue its commitment to serve all students, regardless of background or previous experience in higher education.” 

He said the college must continue to promote inclusion of all students, regardless of their circumstances: “We know that the future of the college means embracing the part-time student, the working student, the parenting student, as well as those who come to us straight out of high school.” 

Additionally, Bonahue embraced the nonconventional programs of study which complement the curriculum offered by the college. “We affirm that as a comprehensive community college, career training, workforce development and economic development are integral and fundamental parts of our mission,” he said, adding, “We are proud of our thousands of students who move annually through our arts and sciences programs, graduate from our honors programs and often transfer to highly selective universities. We are equally proud of our nurses, our welders, our bakers, programmers, our paramedics, our machinists and our accountants.”

During the speech, Bonahue advanced that student experience is the impetus behind his work: “The students’ experience is the reality of the college, and we will keep that truth at the center of how we carry out our mission of student success from day-to-day, from semester-to-semester and from year-to-year.”

The president touched upon the many financial challenges that students may face while pursuing a higher education. He acknowledged that there are still too many people left out of the education system due to the burden of cost. 

“Because the cost of education still too often puts it out of reach for deserving students, we affirm our commitment that a Suffolk education must remain an affordable education,” Bonahue said. “The work of our college foundation as a vehicle for supporting student scholarships and basic needs allows any of us and all of us to invest in our students.”

To access the full speech, click here.

By Bill Landon

The Port Jefferson Steeplefest invitational took place on Saturday, April 9, at the Earl L. Vandermeulen High School, attracting schools from all over Suffolk County. 

Mt. Sinai senior Kate Del Gandio won the girls 100-meter hurdle event with a time of 14.68. Senior Hugo Onghai placed first for Port Jeff in the boys 100-meter hurdles, clocking in at 16.36. In the 2000-meter steeplechase Frosh finals, Shoreham-Wading River’s Anna Minetti finished first with a time of 8:20.82. In the Frosh boys Steeplechase, Patrick Shea of Shoreham-Wading River clocked in at 7:07.36. Del Gandio also placed first in the 100-meter dash with a time of 12.56. Mt. Sinai senior Kyra Franks took the top spot in the 200-meter dash event, besting the field with a 26.09. Port Jeff senior Annie Maier took top honors in the long jump event by traveling 15-11.50. Mt. Sinai’s Kelly Hughes and Casey Campo placed second and third respectively. Julia Sue-Kim-Ling of Smithtown East proved she was the class of the field in the triple jump when she leapt 34-5.25. Kings Park senior Emily Stritzl also placed first in the pole-vault event, clearing 8-0.

 Photos by Bill Landon 

Pixabay photo

By Daniel Dunaief

Daniel Dunaief

When our children were young, we tried the Ferber method to encourage them to put themselves to sleep.

No, we didn’t abandon them in their room and return six hours later with a smile and a wink. We walked out of the room, told them to go to bed, and slowly extended the time before we returned.

It worked, although the complaints sometimes frayed our nerves to the point where we would argue about who drank the last of the milk, and I can’t even drink milk.

When the children got sick, all bets were off. Walking out of the room when they couldn’t breathe, when they had toxic sludge coming out of one or both ends, and when they had a fever was not an option for us, no matter how little sleep we’d had the night, week, or month before.

Once they recovered from their illness, however, we had to go back to the gradual Ferber method again, as they seemed to have forgotten that they might not need anything from us and that they should just close their eyes and go to sleep.

Parenting in the wake of the pandemic is a little like trying to figure out what role to play after the world has been sick for a few years and when we had to adapt whatever parenting rules we had established.

Do we tell them to “suck it up,” to “fend for themselves,” and to “tough it out,” or do we continue to offer support after they, and we, endured a new set of rules designed to keep us safe in the long term, but that caused all kinds of frustration in the shorter term?

Parenting always seems to have more questions than answers, but the number of questions and the frequency with which we ask them seems to have increased.

Indeed, even as our children have reached the age when we no longer have to strain our backs to make sure they don’t walk too close to the edge of a pool or to a rough surf, we still wonder what role, and how aggressively and consistently, we should play after the pandemic.

How many times have we wanted to agree with them in the last few years when they complained that “this isn’t fair?” Offering the reply, “who said life was fair,” didn’t seem appropriate, sympathetic or understanding. That response would only reinforce the reality that a year without graduation, proms, or downtime that didn’t involve a phone or a Monopoly board was definitely not fair.

Recently, I chatted with a parent in my neighborhood whom I haven’t seen in months. Within seconds, she shared her son’s recent tale of woe. Returning to the soccer field, he injured his leg badly enough that he’ll likely be out of action for soccer and several other sports for the next six months.

That, she said, is heartbreaking on top of all the time he missed on the field.

Amid all the concern for his physical well-being, she shared her worry about his mental health. She reached out to psychiatrist and psychologist friends, hoping to find someone with whom he might talk about yet another interruption in his plans to enjoy participating in a team sport.

To her dismay, she found that the mental health care system is as overburdened as the physical one was during the worst of the pandemic. Concerned about the context for her son’s life, she has dialed back her urge to encourage him to return to school on crutches, standing at the ready to bring him home whenever he feels physically and emotionally overwhelmed.

I completely understand that. At the same time, I wonder if and when we might deploy a safe Ferber-style approach after all the disruption of the last few years.

TBR News Media

By Leah S. Dunaief

Leah Dunaief

Another year has rolled by and we again marvel at another anniversary this week of the news group now known as TBR News Media. It started with the lowly Village Times 46 years ago, and actually there was nothing lowly about that first issue. It was 52 pages, mailed to every house in Setauket, Stony Brook and Old Field, and carried some pretty interesting news and graphics.

I guess the biggest news in the April 8th issue, although we didn’t say so, was that there was a second newspaper in town, coming out every Thursday, a day later than the first newspaper, The Three Village Herald. We planned it that way so we could carry most of the week’s news that same week. For example, school board meetings, one of our most important beats, ended late on Tuesday nights and often their agenda didn’t make the other paper until the following week, there being no internet or website in those days, of course. But by coming out on Thursday, while we could report the school news, we couldn’t capture the local supermarket specials, a rich, full page or even two sometimes, because those ads traditionally ran on Wednesday “to give the lady of the house a chance to plan her weekly shopping for the family’s weekends.” Yes, I am quoting the supermarket managers.

This might not strike you as being a particularly significant decision for the newspaper, but it was symbolic of how we viewed our product: news first, advertising second. If we could get the readers, we strategized, the advertising would follow. And history proves us right. We were always something of an upstart. In the beginning, we stopped mailing to every house after the first couple of issues and gave the paper away from news racks in the local stores. Ten months in, we put coin tubes on our newsstands and started to charge a dime, the same as our competition. I can’t tell you, in powerful enough words, how satisfying it was that first day when the dimes rolled out of the tubes and into our palms. Residents were willing to pay, even if only 10 cents, for our efforts.

A couple of years later, we raised the newsstand price to 25 cents, then the industry standard. We were asking a pretty brash question: Were we 21/2 times better than our competition? Yes, there was some tongue clucking about “who did we think we were!” To our relief, our readership grew. Readers put quarters in our tubes and gratification in our hearts. We vowed to work even harder.

What is a community newspaper, really?

We asked ourselves that as we read every other hometown paper we could get our hands on in order to better answer that question. Joining the New York Press Association, which we did two years after we started, helped us network with other publishers across the state for pointers.

We knew that we wanted to be non-partisan, meaning that we would be without party affiliation and completely independent. It was vital that village government news and town board news reach our readers. We particularly favored bragging about our young people, their academic, musical and sports accomplishments. And we created a second section in the paper for cultural events, science and medicine, giving space to local artists and columnists.

We were eager to hear what our readers had to say and made sure we had clearly marked opinion pages for that purpose. Our opinions were there, too. And we thought of the paper as a mirror that was held up to reflect the community we served, providing future historians with the chronology and sentiments of the day.

Most especially, we believed in fairness. And facts. In a controversial situation, we wanted all sides to be heard and heard accurately. We left it to our readers to judge. They were intelligent beings and we never dumbed down the stories for them. Further, we saw as part of our job to protect our communities and their natural beauty from those who would cause harm. Come to think of it, in our six papers, on our website and our social media platforms, that’s about what we still do.