Village Times Herald

Police commissioner Geraldine Hart. File photo

On April 14, Suffolk County Police Commissioner Geraldine Hart announced she was stepping down from the position.

The announcement comes three years after she took over the role Tim Sini left vacant when he began his term as Suffolk County district attorney. Hart has accepted the position of Hofstra University’s director of Public Safety. According to Hofstra’s website, she will begin this summer.

Hart, who is a 21-year FBI veteran, was the 14th commissioner of SCPD and the first female police commissioner in Suffolk’s history.

According to the Suffolk County Police Department, Chief Stuart Cameron will serve as acting commissioner until Hart’s replacement is found.

New Suffolk County Police officers were sworn in this week at the academy in Brentwood. Photo by Kimberly Brown

By Kimberly Brown 

A total of 54 new recruits were sworn in by Suffolk County officials in Brentwood police academy, Monday, April 12.

  Suffolk County Executive Steve Bellone (D) and county Police Commissioner Geraldine Hart were responsible for swearing in the second portion of the class, one that had the highest percentage of minorities in the history of the county.  

The first class, holding 50 recruits, was sworn in March 29. With a total of 104 recruits from all over Suffolk County, including eight women, 28% are minorities and 10 are fluent in Spanish. 

Photo by Kimberly Brown

“Being a law enforcement officer is a crucial role in our society,” Bellone said. “So first let me say thank you for your willingness to stand up and serve your community and being willing to take on the responsibilities of a law enforcement officer.” 

 Almost half the recruiting class had prior law enforcement experience and one-third of the class are military veterans.  

Bellone expressed his anticipation for the recruits to begin their 30-day training.

Special recognition was given to the good Samaritans, a retired NYPD officer and a Marine, who did not hesitate to offer assistance to Officer Christopher Racioppo in his time of need after a traffic stop stabbing in Patchogue Saturday. 

“Officers responded immediately and relied on their training, the quality training that they received here in this academy to make the critical, split-second decisions that needed to be made that very well may have saved his life,” Hart said.  

Hart welcomed the new class in taking their next step into a life of service as they embark on their new careers in law enforcement.

Former Setauket Fire District commissioner Jay Gardiner recently received a proclamation for his service from Suffolk County Legislator Kara Hahn. Photo from Kara Hahn’s office

When Jay Gardiner decided last year not to run for reelection for fire commissioner in the Setauket Fire District, the former chairman of the board put the cap on decades of fire rescue experience.

Jay Gardiner, second from left, celebrates the grand opening of the district’s main firehouse in 2019 with former Brookhaven Town Councilwoman Valerie Cartright, Fire Chief Paul Rodier and Brookhaven Supervisor Ed Romaine. Photo by Bob O’Rourk

The longtime member of the Setauket Fire Department, who completed 30 years of volunteer service at the end of 2019, said he and his wife, Diane, are planning to move to Florida at the end of the year. While the soon-to-be 70-year-old is looking forward to spending more time with his wife and playing golf, he said he will still run his business Gardiner Plastics from a home office. The former commissioner said if he didn’t do some kind of work, he would be bored.

“I’ve been a workaholic most of my life,” he said.

When Gardiner joined the fire department in 1989, he already had 20 years of community service under his belt. Originally from Fresh Meadows, he served as an EMT in Queens with several volunteer ambulance crews.

“I’m a city boy, but I moved here in ’86,” he said. “It still makes me an old-timer, but that’s late compared to a lot of people that I know.”

Through the decades, in addition to volunteering with the department, he was an EMS lieutenant for the last 12 years. He was also an associate professor of Emergency Medical Care at Suffolk County Community College for 20 years, and he taught instructor-level courses for Suffolk EMS. At St. Francis Hospital, he was on the training faculty where he taught advance life support courses to its medical staff.

The South Setauket resident was appointed as commissioner in May of 2015 to fill the remainder of the term previously held by Thomas Gallagher. Later that year, Gardiner was elected to a five-year term as commissioner, and during his last three years on the board, he served as chairman.

When Gardiner first ran for fire commissioner in 2015, he said he felt his business background would come in handy. The former commissioner holds an MBA from the NYU Stern School of Business and has served on several organizational boards in the plastic industry.

When it comes to the board of fire commissioners and the departments in the district, Gardiner sees it as a team effort, and he’s proud of what the district has accomplished over the last few years.

“You can’t get the fire truck or the ambulance to the scene with one person,” he said. “It takes a group of people. It takes an officer. It takes a crew. It takes a driver. And if you don’t have all those working together, you don’t have an efficient department or an efficient board. The board has to work together, we have to be a team, and we’ve been very fortunate.”

“The board has to work together, we have to be a team, and we’ve been very fortunate.”

— Jay Gardiner

Some of the accomplishments Gardiner listed include the renovation of the main firehouse on Route 25A, the purchase of four new fire engines and updated equipment such as radios and air packs to modernize the emergency system. He also counts the addition of a few career firefighters during the day to the department as an accomplishment of the board.

“We were the first one on Long Island to actually call them career firefighters,” Gardiner said. “Nobody wanted to take that jump. It’s not an indictment on the volunteers.”

While it was a tough decision, he said the commissioners have a responsibility to the community. 

“Your job is a fiduciary responsibility to take care of that community, and 30 years ago, there were loads of people who lived in the community during the day, they could respond to the alarms,” he said. “The demographic has totally changed.”

With his departure from the board of commissioners, one of his teammates for decades, John Wastiewiz, took over as chairman of the board. Wastiewiz said he has known Gardiner since before the latter joined the fire department, when his wife worked for Gardiner Plastics. Wastiewiz described the former commissioner as the ultimate professional, and said he considered Gardiner the go-to guy, especially when it came to questions about EMS.

“Everything he’s done, whether it’s paramedic or fire commissioner, he’s always strived to be the best and constantly improving his skills and education, and he’s just a very good guy in general.” Wastiewiz said.

Gardiner said when it comes to being a volunteer firefighter he misses responding
to scenes.

“My wife always looks at me and she goes, ‘You miss it, don’t you?’” he said. “I say, ‘Yup,’ but everything has its time.”

When he moves to Florida, he said he will also miss the Three Village area, where his children grew up and went through the Three Village school district. He said he will especially miss the sense of local history and the area near Emma Clark library and the Frank Melville Memorial Park.

“We’ve always loved living in this area,” he said. “It has good restaurants and good people. The civics and the chamber of commerce do a lot of work to try to build up the area.”

However, while Gardiner and his wife may be moving, he said they will be back to visit as their four children, three daughters-in-law and three grandchildren live on Long Island.

When asked if he had some advice to share with his fellow Setauket firefighters, Gardiner said it’s important to remember the constant commitment to the community. 

“Never get complacent,” he said. “There’s always room for improvement. It gives you the motivation to push forward. You don’t want to say, ‘I’m done.’”

The Philips Azurion 7 provides imaging capabilities at ultra-low radiation dose levels. Photo from Stony Brook Medicine

Stony Brook University Hospital has taken a step in offering cardiac diagnosis and treatment that is even more advanced than in the past.

SBUH’s Dr. Robert Pyo, Dr. Henry Tannous, Dr. Eric Rashba and Dr. Hal Skopicki stand in the new multifunctional lab. Photo from Stony Brook Medicine

Recently, the hospital announced the opening of its Cardiac Catheterization and Electrophysiology Advanced Multifunctional Laboratory in the Stony Brook University Heart Institute at SBUH. The lab consolidates comprehensive cardiac catheterization and electrophysiology services into one location.

The multifunctional laboratory measures 845 square feet to allow room for various medical teams to perform emergency procedures at the same time if needed. The room includes anesthesia equipment, state-of-the-art angiographic suite equipment and the latest electrophysiology technology. In the lab, physicians are able to continue treating a patient even if the scope of a procedure changes from minimally invasive to more invasive.

When it came time to design the multifunctional laboratory, administrative and medical professionals were able to provide input including Cath Lab Director, Dr. Robert Pyo and EP Lab Director Dr. Eric Rashba.

Pyo said it was important to get input not only from doctors but nurses and technicians, who play a crucial part in documenting procedures, information that will be used during a patient’s treatment.

Rashba said time was spent with the construction group to ensure everything was laid out correctly and that it would work for both specialties in the multifunctional lab. He added that work began April 12 to renovate five existing labs, three Cath and two EP, adjacent to the new Cath/EP lab on the main level of the Heart Institute. One lab at a time will be worked on, and while the additional renovations will take several months, Rashba said the number of patients that Stony Brook doctors can treat will increase, and patients will be able to get appointments quicker than in the past.

“What we’ve seen over time in electrophysiology is that you see more and more patients with arrhythmias that need treatment,” he said. “There’s been an incredible growth in ablation procedures, in particular atrial fibrillation. This will allow us to meet the community need with less waiting times for procedures. So, we’re looking forward to that.”

Since the lab opened March 30, both doctors said the imaging has been superior to what they had been using before. The lab includes an image-guided diagnostic and therapeutic imaging system called the Philips Azurion 7.

“We’re replacing systems that have been installed for over 10 years,” Rashba said. “First of all, we can see a lot better what the definition of the structures are we need to see, plus the radiation definition is a lot lower. So, we’re getting better imaging with less dose to the patient.”

Rashba added that some EP procedures can even be done without radiation.

Pyo said the new multifunctional lab also saves doctors precious time when treating heart patients with both catheterization and electrophysiology in the same room.

“The importance of timing, reducing the time to treatment, whether it’s minutes or seconds, is relative,” Pyo said. “I think that in any case, even in patients who come in electively, getting early diagnosis is crucial.”

Being able to respond quicker is especially crucial with treatment of heart attacks.

“Patients who are presenting with a heart attack, minutes, even seconds, count toward early diagnosis and treatment,” Pyo said, adding if patients don’t get treatment early enough they could suffer irreversible damage.

Photo by Julianne Mosher

There’s a place for people of all abilities to play soccer, and it’s right in Centereach.

TOPSoccer is a new program within Middle Country Children’s Soccer devoted solely to children with physical, mental or behavioral disabilities.

Rob Draper, a financial advisor at Draper Asset Management in Smithtown and club president of SB Athletico Soccer Club, said he wanted to provide a place where all different types of people can run, play and score goals together without judgment or fear. 

“Soccer helped me experience my kids’ childhoods,” he said. “With soccer, there were times where I would go, ‘Wow. That’s great,’ and our goal is to give those moments to these parents so they can experience it, too.”

Draper teamed up with Dave Phaff, also of SB Athletico, and James Malone, president of Middle Country Children’s Soccer to make this dream a reality.

“We’re all just good-hearted people that just really enjoy working with children and watching them grow into young women and men,” Phaff said. 

Officially kicking off last weekend, the program is made up primarily of skills sessions that help teach the participants the game of soccer, while at the same time providing them with an environment that is fun and pressure-free.

Phaff said the whole process took less than three months to get off the ground, and everyone was immediately on board. 

Joining the team is Tara Phaff, Dave’s wife — who is also a Doctor of Physical Therapy — who helped create the best plans for each individual participant’s needs.   

According to Middle Country TOPSoccer, the team encourages any child or adult who is differently-abled to get involved — and its 100% free.

With no questions asked, Draper wanted to fund the program for the families who decide to join in.

“Rob said to me, ‘I really want to start a special needs soccer program and I’ll fully fund it. I don’t care what it costs, I’ll fund it,’” Phaff added. “He has a great heart.”

While other soccer clubs do encourage inclusivity, Phaff said there aren’t too many locations where kids of different abilities can play further out east. That’s why Centereach was a great, central spot to get the ball rolling.

On Saturday, April 10, the group held its opening day at Oxhead Road Elementary School where 25 individuals, ranging in ages five to 55, headed to the field to kick, run and enjoy the sunshine. 

Some of the participants have Down syndrome, some on the autism spectrum and two children were able to play soccer from their wheelchairs. One thing they all had in common was the giant smiles on their faces.

Each player, Phaff said, gets a buddy that works with them every practice. These buddies are volunteers and soccer players, themselves, who help the individual and stand beside them the whole time — and they are anticipating even more players to come join them this season.

“The whole purpose of this is to give these kids an opportunity to be accepted and feel like they are part of something,” Phaff said. “So, we won’t turn anybody down.”

TOPSoccer has their practices every Saturday at 10 a.m. at Oxhead Elementary School in Centereach. Families who are interested in joining can register online at mccsoccer.org.

The Three Village Chamber of Commerce welcomed Koeppel Dental Group (A Dental 365 Company), Druthers Coffee and Jersey Mike’s Subs to the community with a celebratory ribbon cutting on April 5. All three businesses are located in Stony Brook Square at 1113 North Country Road in Stony Brook. 

The event was attended by New York State Assemblyman Steve Englebright, Kim Bryant from Suffolk County Legislator Kara Hahn’s office,  Town of Brookhaven Councilman Jonathan Kornreich and members of the chamber. 

“The Three Village Chamber of Commerce is working to beat back the economic impact of COVID-19 by helping new businesses open and existing businesses safely reopen. As someone who knows just how difficult it is to start a small business, I applaud the entrepreneurs behind Druthers Coffee, Koeppel Dental Group, and Jersey Mike’s Subs for opening their doors here in Three Village,” said Councilman Kornreich in a statement. 

“Main Street America’s Small Business Day took place on April 13, and I’m optimistic that we will see more growth and opportunity across the First Council District,” he added.

Steven Zaitz won first place in the Spot News Photo category for this picture which was featured on the cover of The Village Times Herald on Nov. 5, 2020

By Heidi Sutton

From news articles and feature stories to photography, special supplements and classifieds, Times Beacon Record News Media raked in 10 awards, including three for first place, from the New York Press Association’s annual Better Newspaper Contest. The winners were announced during NYPA’s annual, and this year’s virtual Spring Conference on April 8 and 9. Over 150 newspapers competed for awards in 64 categories. 

Editor Julianne Mosher won third place in the News Story category for her article titled “Local pharmacies concerned over Amazon Pharmacy.” The judge wrote, “Well done, with good interviews that give the reader the complete picture.” Mosher also won third place in the Feature Story category for “Local dance studios change shape in the age of COVID.”

“This story shows the other side of the COVID-19 pandemic,” commented the judge. “It may not be about health care workers, but it told a story of resilience on the part of businesses and young people looking to have some sense of normalcy.”

Photo by Steven Zaitz

Former editor Kyle Barr also did well, winning first place in the Feature Story category with his article, “History of Pride: LI’s first LGBT march reveals history of fighting prejudice.” The judge commented, “This piece was extremely well done and not only covered the history of the event, but brought the emotions of it to the forefront.” Barr also received an honorable mention in the News Story category for his article “Bars/restaurants on north shore struggle to comply with restrictions.”

Reporter Daniel Dunaief won second place in the Feature Story category for his piece, “Health care workers become critical partners in viral battles,” which honored local health care workers who put themselves in harm’s way to offer comfort, cures and solutions for COVID-19. The judge wrote, “This story brought us the stories of health care heroes that have been so important in all of our communities this past year.”

Freelance photographer Steven Zaitz won first place in the Spot News Photo category for an emotional image captured at a Trump rally last October.“The moment that tells the whole story. Great shot to sum up all sides and be fair to all points,” commented the judge.

 

Zaitz also won third place in the Sports Feature Photo category. The image, which was featured in the article, “Let’s Play Two: Little League Holds Championship Games,” impressed the judge. “In our state (of Pennsylvania), it’s no longer allowed to tank the catcher. If the same is true in New York, at least this little guy got as much as he could out of his illegal action. The determined catcher’s expression completes the scene.” for an image that was featured in the article, “Let’s play two: little league holds championship games.” 

TBR News Media won first place in the Best Public Service or Non-Profit Special Section for its 2020 Graduation supplement. “What a fantastic section to put together for Senior Class, their families, and the community during a pandemic. Outstanding work!” gushed the judge. The paper won second place in the Innovative Ad Project category for its TBR Artist Coloring Book which the judges said was a “great idea to get the readers to interact with newspapers and doing a contest.” 

The paper also won second place in the Classified Advertising category. “This newspaper has created a classified section that does not feel overbearing or overcrowded. With judicial use of space and bolded type, the section is easy to read,” wrote the judge.

“We are, of course, thrilled to continue our winning ways in the annual New York Press Association Better Newspaper Contest,” said Publisher Leah Dunaief. “But some things must be said particularly for this year’s performance. First, as always, we feel so privileged for the chance to serve the community with our newspapers, website and social media. We are grateful for the support of both readers and advertisers in every season and especially now, during this unprecedented time of the COVID-19 pandemic, as we have struggled to fulfill our mission of publishing relevant news and information.”

“The staff and I have drawn inspiration from the people who live and work in the community. They have tirelessly delivered food, provided health care and ensured that everyone endured through a health and economic challenge we have never before seen but are now confronting. We have been deeply moved by the willingness to help each other that we have witnessed in order to get to a safer tomorrow. And finally, blessings on all our clearly talented staff members, without whose Herculean efforts we could not prevail.”

NYPA holds the Better Newspaper Contest each year during their spring conference. For a full list of winners and more information, visit nynewspapers.com.

 

Pexels photo

The Suffolk County Department of Health Services has paused dispensing of the Johnson and Johnson COVID-19 vaccine at its vaccination dispensing locations, following state and federal recommendations while the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) and the U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA) review data about an extremely rare type of blood clot that has been reported in six people who received that vaccine in the United States.

As of April 12, more than 6.8 million doses of the Johnson & Johnson (Janssen) vaccine have been administered in the U.S. CDC and FDA are reviewing data involving a rare and severe type of blood clot that was reported in six people after receiving the Johnson & Johnson vaccine. All six cases occurred among women between the ages of 18 and 48, and symptoms occurred six to 13 days after vaccination.

Suffolk County officials are not aware of any cases occurring among the approximately 2,000 residents who have received this vaccine through the County Health Department thus far. Those residents who received the Johnson & Johnson vaccine who develop severe headache, abdominal pain, leg pain or shortness of breath within three weeks after vaccination should contact their health care practitioners promptly.

“While this issue appears to be extremely rare, CDC and FDA are acting in a very cautious manner that underscores our commitment to vaccine safety,” said Dr. Gregson Pigott, Suffolk County Commissioner of Health Services. “We will be closely monitoring the federal review process and use that information to help guide our efforts here in Suffolk County in the days ahead.”

The Johnson & Johnson vaccine represents about 2% of the total supply of vaccines the Suffolk County Department of Health has received to date, so the pause is not expected to dramatically slow the pace of vaccinations dispensed by Suffolk County. As Suffolk County Department of Health Services does not maintain data on all vaccine providers in Suffolk County, other dispensers may have received and dispensed varying percentages of Johnson & Johnson vaccine in the community.

Residents who currently have appointments to receive the Johnson & Johnson vaccine should watch for a notification from their provider about canceling, postponing or rescheduling the appointment. If your appointment is cancelled, you can look for other vaccination appointments through the Vaccine Locator map, local pharmacies or your area.

CDC will convene a meeting of its Advisory Committee on Immunization Practices (ACIP) on April 14 to further review these cases and assess their potential significance. FDA will review that analysis as it also investigates the cases.

Meanwhile, until that process is complete, Suffolk County health officials will continue to dispense the allocations of Pfizer or Moderna vaccines that the county receives from New York State.

Pixabay image

By Leah S. Dunaief

Leah Dunaief

Virtually everyone seems to agree that when the pandemic is finally over, life will not be the same as it was pre-COVID-19. Prominent among the changes will be some degree of working remotely. Before the virus descended, requests to work from home at least part of the week were typically refused by employers. Enter “Zoom” in lock-step with the pathogen.

Technically, Zoom was among us before the virus but only a small segment of the population used the platform. Once we were restrained to our homes, we laypeople discovered how easy and useful it was “to Zoom,” and the name became a verb, much like Xerox or Google. So certainly Zooming will remain with us for a long time to come. But what are its unintended consequences?

For one, there is the phrase that has now entered the English language: Zoom fatigue. We, who are on Zoom regularly and for long periods, understand this term. According to an article in National Geographic, published this past Tuesday and written by Theresa Machemer, new research offers data on this phenomenon to confirm our perceived discomfort.

Here are some interesting bits of information. On average, women report 13.8 percent more Zoom fatigue than men. Here is more: besides long days full of calls with few breaks that are the culprits, the self-view video, the crowd of faces on the screen, the expectation to stay in view of the camera, and the lack of nonverbal cues all tax the brain. I would add to that the lag between what is said and its transmission is tiring for the eyes and frustrating to the point of encouraging us to talk louder, which too is tiring.

OK, so we can agree that remote working has its perks: “no commutes, flexibility to handle household tasks, and easy access to conferences for all workers, including those with disabilities.” To an extent, we can now live where we want to live, and we can attend class even if the school shuts down due to an emergency or natural disaster. (No more snow days, sorry.) 

So here is what the scientists who specialize in the interactions between humans and technology developed, according to National Geographic. They created a tool to measure fatigue, called the Zoom Exhaustion and Fatigue Scale, or ZEF. They then used this in large surveys to measure that fatigue, in addition to how long each person spends on Zoom and demographics. Here are four factors that affect teleworkers.

The “lack of nonverbal cues is stressful because people cannot naturally convey or interpret gestures and body language when just their colleagues’ shoulders and heads are visible.” That presents a constant struggle to the viewer for proper communication.

Here is another, perhaps surprising response. “During video calls, people report feeling trapped in one spot so they can stay within view of the webcam.” As a result, they feel stressed, according to the researchers. Further, the default window, in which users see themselves constantly, can cause “mirror anxiety,” a self-consciousness that can result in distraction and has been linked to depression. 

Finally, there is something termed “hypergaze,” in which the viewer feels that the other person or people on the call are staring at them, their faces appearing so near and so intense as to cause discomfort for the brain.

The survey confirmed that women who spend more time in meetings, with shorter breaks between them than men, reported greater mirror anxiety and felt more trapped by their video calls.

How to cope: use a standing desk to feel less trapped; an orange filter on the screen may reduce eye strain; take at least ten minute breaks between video calls; ask conferencing companies to limit the maximum display size of heads on the screen; use some form of hybrid scheduling for home-office work.

I cannot let this subject go, however, without thanking the tech companies for making it possible for me to “see” my family members during this separation of more than a year. It has kept us connected and sane.

 

Pixabay photo

By Daniel Dunaief

Daniel Dunaief

After a year filled with various kinds of losses in 2020, many residents are coping with emotional burdens, including a calendar filled with anniversaries of painful memories.

Called the anniversary effect, people who have been grieving losses are approaching and, in some cases have passed, the one year anniversary of the death of a family member, the last time they saw a family member in person, or the day they dropped a friend who couldn’t breathe off at a hospital.

“It’s good to acknowledge an anniversary is coming up,” said Mandi Zucker, a licensed social worker with a certificate in grief recovery and in thanatology, which is the study of death and dying. Those who feel comfortable offering their support might want to ask someone who is grieving what they are doing, if they have any plans and how they might spend the day.

Zucker, who is the founder of Inner-Harbor, a center that helps young adults who are grieving, cautioned that reaching out to someone only as an anniversary approaches might backfire.

If the anniversary is the only time someone reaches out, “that might feel disingenuous,” Zucker cautioned. People who are grieving might wonder “where you’ve been for the past year, if you are reaching out as if the other 364 days have not been difficult.”

People eager to provide support to the many residents who are dealing with the symptoms and after effects of grief should first make sure they are comfortable enough with their own lives to respond to their family and friends.

“Don’t ask if you’re not ready to hear it,” Zucker suggested. “If you’re going through something yourself and you’re in a hurry and don’t have the time, don’t ask.”

Support often takes the form of listening, rather than interrupting or talking. Zucker suggests people encourage those who are grieving to speak, without interrupting them, sharing their own anecdotes or judging them.

While it might not sound like long, two minutes is considerably longer than most people can offer their thoughts and feelings, as others typically interrupt well before then.

“There is nothing we can say that’ll fix” grief, Zucker said. “Our goal to be supportive is to let them say more. When you’re talking with them, think about why you are talking.”

Commenting on someone’s experience, by acknowledging that their description sounds sad, scary or painful, gives them an opening to continue to share.

When someone says, “It’s been rough with COVID,” almost everyone can offer their own experiences with the virus, the losses of freedom, and opportunity that they’ve felt, she said. Even though a supporter might want to share their experience to relate, the person who is grieving is likely better off having an opening to continue to share and experience their feelings, Zucker suggested.

Sometimes, just allowing the person to tell you to go away gives people control over a life that seems out of control.

“You can give them space, [but] you can also send an email or text saying that you are still thinking about them,” Zucker said. “You don’t have to imply that they must respond.”

Zucker is a fan of handwritten notes, which provide a material connection when someone doesn’t feel like talking, but can see a physical reminder of their connection to others.

If people notice that someone who is grieving isn’t getting dressed or showering, they can comment on it, letting them “know you see them.”

Zucker has a contrary view to the comment people often receive about being strong. For her, people show strength by being vulnerable, not by masking their feelings.

People who might be experiencing grief might also need to diversify their sources of support and strength. That could include meditating or going for walks.