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Yearly Archives: 2024

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Get up close and personal with turtles at Cold Spring Harbor Fish Hatchery's Turtle Experience.
PROGRAMS

Turtle Experience

Cold Spring Harbor Fish Hatchery, 1660 Route 25A, Cold Spring Harbor offers a Turtle Experience Aug. 22 to Aug. 31 from 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. Meet the youngest hatchling turtles and adult turtles too. Discover why turtles play an important role in our environment and how you can help protect their habitat and way of life. Get a picture with your favorite turtle. Each session is 20 minutes. $12 per person. Online registration required at cshfishhatchery.org. 516-692-6768

Tiny Tots in a Tiny World

Sunken Meadow State Park, Sunken Meadow Parkway, Kings Park presents a program for ages 3 to 5, Tiny Tots in a Tiny World, on Aug. 22 from 10:30 a.m. to 11:30 a.m. Enjoy short walks, story time, animal visitors, and crafts. $4 per child. Reservations taken on eventbrite.com.

First Steps in Nature

Sweetbriar Nature Center, 62 Eckernkamp Drive, Smithtown continues its First Steps in Nature series for ages 2 to 4 on Aug. 23 at 9:30 a.m. with hands-on exciting activities, crafts, stories and much more. Children will gain a greater appreciation of nature and wildlife while having fun. $20 per child. To register, visit sweetbriarnc.org. 631-979-6344

Game Time!

Children ages 3 to 12 with a parent or caregiver are invited to drop by Emma Clark Library, 120 Main St., Setauket for some free play with board games on Aug. 24 from 2 to 4 p.m. No registration required. Questions? Email [email protected]

Story & Craft with Nana Carol

The Next Chapter bookstore, 204 New York Ave., Huntington hosts a Story and Craft event with Nana Carol on Aug. 26 at 10:30 a.m. Free. No registration required. Appropriate for ages 0-4. 631-482-5008

Perler Palooza

Children in grades K-6 with a parent or caregiver are invited to stop by Emma Clark Library, 120 Main St., Setauket to make a Perler bead creation of your choice on Aug. 27 from 2:30 to 4:30 p.m. No registration required. Questions? Email [email protected]

Growing Up Wild

Town of Brookhaven hosts a children’s program for ages 3 to 6, Growing Up Wild, on Aug. 31 at Cedar Beach Nature Center, Harbor Beach Blvd., Mt. Sinai at 10 a.m. and again at 2 p.m. Parents and grandparents are invited to explore nature with their little ones. Each class will focus on a different nature topic and may include a story time, live animals and an activity. Free but registration is required by emailing [email protected]

Field Journaling Workshop

Caleb Smith State Park Preserve, 581 W. Jericho Turnpike, Smithtown presents a Field Journaling Workshop for ages 12 and up on Aug. 31 from 10:30 a.m. to noon.  Explore the Preserve with a pencil in hand as you sketch the natural world. All skill levels are welcome and all materials are provided, but feel free to bring your own. Reservations taken on eventbrite.com.

Art in the Barn

Walt Whitman Birthplace, 246 Old Walt Whitman Road, Huntington Station  continues its Art in the Barn series for children in Pre-K to 3rd Grade and their parent/guardian with a workshop on Ancient Hieroglyphics on Aug. 31 from 11 a.m. to 12:30 p.m. Taught by Lena Massari Sawyer, come learn to write your name in ancient hieroglyphics and try on a pharaoh’s crown.  $35 per child and guardian, $20 second child. Pre-registration is required by visiting  waltwhitman.org.

THEATER

‘Finding Nemo Jr.’

Extended! Summer fun continues at the John W. Engeman Theater, 250 Main St., Northport with Finding Nemo Jr. from July 20 to Sept. 1. In this musical adaptation of the beloved 2003 Pixar movie, Nemo is captured and taken to Sydney, Marlin faces his fears and sets off on an epic adventure across the ocean. With the help of lovable characters such as Dory, Crush, and the Tank Gang, Marlin, and Nemo both overcome challenges on their journey to find each other and themselves. All seats are $20. To order, call 631-261-2900 or visit engemantheater.com.

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St. Charles Hospital Emergency Department ribbon cutting on 8/19/24. Photo courtesy of St. Charles Hospital

Catholic Health’s St. Charles Hospital in Port Jefferson hosted a ceremonial ribbon cutting for its Emergency Department (ED) expansion on Aug. 14. The event was attended by Catholic Health executive leadership, hospital staff, as well as local elected officials and community partners. The newly renovated and expanded emergency department officially opened to patients on Aug. 19.

The $10 million project, was partially funded with a $4.2 million grant from the New York State Facility Transformation program, as well as other funds supported by Catholic Health and philanthropic support. The ED expansion includes an additional 4,000 square feet, doubling the size, with 10 more treatment bays and a larger waiting room.

“St. Charles’ ED expansion will provide an opportunity to better manage patient flow and address the disparate needs of patients seeking emergency care, allowing for the overall higher quality of patient care,” said St. Charles Hospital President James O’Connor. “We are very excited for this major facility improvement, allowing us to continue to meet the emergent medical needs of the communities we serve.”

In addition, the renovations include additional space, which will allow for better patient management of those seeking medically supervised chemical dependency withdrawal and stabilization and rehabilitation services.

“Long Island has a drug problem of epic proportions, but Catholic Health does not run from this challenge,” said Catholic Health President and CEO Patrick O’Shaughnessy, DO, MBA. “St. Charles’ expanded ED will include an additional care environment, offering specialized care for dependency patients. This will allow doctors and nurses to focus on the needs of distinct patient populations, safely and effectively.”

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Jennifer M. Cushman, MD

New York Spine & Pain Specialists, a division of New York Health (NY Health), has announced the addition of Jennifer M. Cushman, MD, to its Interventional Pain and Spine team. 

Dr. Cushman is dedicated to providing support and interventions to treat chronic pain and joint-related pathologies, improve ambulation and function, and improve her patients’ independence and quality of life. She also specializes in treating various chronic pain and joint conditions, including low back pain, knee, shoulder, and various joint-related pathologies using both ultrasound and fluoroscopy techniques. 

She speaks English, Spanish, and Polish.

“We are thrilled to welcome Dr. Jennifer Cushman to our team,” said Dr. Chris Ng, MD, Executive Director of NY Health. “Her extensive training, clinical research background, and commitment to patient-centered care align perfectly with our mission to provide the highest-quality pain management services.”

“I am excited to join New York Health, a rapidly growing practice renowned for its wide array of interventional and minimally invasive surgical treatment options for chronic pain,” said Dr. Cushman. “NY Health offers numerous academic opportunities that will allow me to pursue clinical research and advance cancer pain management, ultimately helping patients who are suffering.”

Dr. Cushman will practice at 5316 Nesconset Highway, Port Jefferson Station and 300 Old Country Road, Suite 1, Riverhead. To make an appointment, please call 631-474-0707. 

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'Winged Shack' by Doug Reina will be on view through Oct. 6. Photo courtesy of Doug Reina
'The Big Deer on Two Chairs' by Doug Reina
'Montauk Cabin' by Doug Reina

Campo Cuttica, 12 Whitebrook Drive, Flanders will present an art exhibit by artist Doug Reina from August 24 to Oct. 6. Titled “Doug Reina: As I See It,” the exhibit will feature Reina’s most recent figurative paintings which combine his unique personal choice of subject matter with powerful light, shadows, colors and shapes. It is Reina’s intention to connect with the viewer by creating paintings that portray quiet, self-reflective emotional moments, which we all share during the course of one’s lifetime.

Reina is a two-time Pollock-Krasner grant recipient whose studio is in Setauket. He is a full-time artist who creates paintings both on location, as well as in his studio of the unique landscapes and people and structures that are part of his life.

Campo Cuttica is home to several public and private art studios with a large exhibition gallery and sculpture yard. The gallery features a diverse collection of contemporary and modern art from established and emerging artists. 

The community is invited to an opening reception on Saturday, Aug. 24 from 5 to 7 p.m. and an ArtTalk on Saturday, Oct. 5 from 5 to 7 p.m. The opening reception and ArtTalk are free and open to the public. Apart from the opening and ArtTalk, the show is by appointment only. To schedule an appointment, call 631-259-1214. 

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Photo courtesy of SCPD

READY TO PROTECT AND SERVE

Suffolk County Police Acting Commissioner Robert Waring swore in the 191st class of police recruits at the Suffolk County Police Academy in Brentwood on Aug. 19.  

Of the 80 SCPD recruits, seven are fluent Spanish speakers while more than 60 percent have prior military experience. In addition to the SCPD recruits, the class is also comprised of 25 Suffolk County deputy sheriffs and 21 recruits representing East Hampton Town, Southampton Town, Shelter Island Town, Southold Town, Riverhead Town and Stony Brook University Police. 

Good luck to all the recruits as they begin their journey to protect and serve the people of Suffolk County.

 

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POWERHOUSE POP VOCAL TRIO Celebrating four decades of iconic Diva hits, DIVAS3 heads to the John W. Engeman Theater on Aug. 26. Photo courtesy of The John W. Engeman Theater
Ongoing

Huntington Summer Arts Festival

The 59th annual Huntington Summer Arts Festival returns to Heckscher Park, 2 Prime Ave., Huntington from June 21 to Aug. 24, Wednesdays to Saturdays at 8 p.m., and Sundays at 7 p.m. The 10-week festival will feature over 40 live performances including dance, theater and music. Bring seating. Held rain or shine. Free. For a list of scheduled performers, visit huntingtonarts.org. 631-271-8423

Thursday August 22

Family Fun Day

The Long Island Game Farm, 489 Chapman Blvd., Manorville and the Foundation for Wildlife Sustainability presents its first annual Family Fun Day from 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. The day’s events will include a celebration of the beloved capybaras with a “Happy Capy Day” theme, including games and challenges, a camel meet-and-greet, storytelling by Long Island authors, tortoise talk,  a concert by Brady Rymer and The Little Band That Could, interactive sing-a- long with singer-songwriter Anne O’Rourke, face painting, scavenger hunt, family holiday photo station, and more. Tickets are $30 at the door. 631-878-6344

Historic Harbor Tours

The Northport Historical Society presents Historic Harbor Tours at 5 p.m. and again at 6 p.m. Get a new perspective on Northport when you spend a relaxing evening learning local history while cruising in the harbor on launches from Seymour’s Boatyard 63 Bayview Avenue, Northport. The 45-minute guided harbor tour will spotlight the rich waterfront history that has helped shape the community. Followed by drinks and light fare. Tickets are $75, $60 members. Rain date is Aug. 28. 631-757-9859, northporthistorical.org

Port Jefferson Greek Festival

Opa! Greek Church of the Assumption, 430 Sheep Pasture Road, Port Jefferson presents its annual Greek Festival tonight from 5 to 10 p.m., Aug. 23 from 5 to 11 p.m., Aug. 24 from 1 p.m. to 11 p.m. and Aug. 25 from noon to 9 p.m. with vendors, authentic Greek delights, dancing, music, carnival rides, church tour and giant raffle. Fireworks on Aug. 23 and 24 at 9:15 p.m. (weather permitting), raffle drawing on Aug. 25 at 7 p.m. $2 per person, free for children under 12. 631-473-0894, portjeffgreekfest.com.

Holbrook Carnival

Join the Holbrook Chamber of Commerce for its annual Carnival & Festival on the grounds of the Holbrook Country Club, 700 Patchogue-Holbrook Road, Holbrook tonight and Aug. 23 from 6 to 11 p.m., Aug. 24 from 2 to 11 p.m. and Aug. 25 from 2 to 9 p.m. Games, food, rides, craft vendors, entertainment. 631-471-2725

Harborside Concerts

Harborside concerts in the Village of Port Jefferson conclude with a special concert by The Movin’ Out Band on the Ferry Dock at 7 p.m.  Bring seating. 631-473-4724, portjeff.com

Friday August 23

Port Jefferson Greek Festival

See Aug. 22 listing.

Holbrook Carnival

See Aug. 22 listing.

Happenings on Main Street

Northport Arts Coalition presents Happenings on Main Street, free concerts at the Northport Village Park Gazebo at the harbor Friday evenings at 7 p.m. through Aug. 30. Tonight’s performance will feature the Dead Ahead Band. Bring seating. 631-261-1872

Long Island Comedy Festival

Theatre Three, 412 Main St., Port Jefferson hosts the Long Island Comedy Festival tonight at 8 p.m. Titled Moms’ Night Out, the evening will feature comedians Marla Schultz, Kendra Cunningham, Meghan Hanley and Maria Walsh. Tickets are $65. To order, call 631-928-9100 or visit theatrethree.com. 

Friday Night Face Off – this event has been canceled

Long Island’s longest running Improv Comedy Show, Friday Night Face Off, returns to Theatre Three’s Second Stage, 412 Main St., Port Jefferson tonight at 10:30 p.m. Using audience suggestions, FNFO pits two teams of improvisers against each other in an all-out championship! Recommended for ages 16 and up, due to adult content. Tickets are $15 at the door, cash only. 631-928-9100

Saturday August 24

Port Jefferson Greek Festival

See Aug. 22 listing.

Holbrook Carnival

See Aug. 22 listing.

Birding by the Beach

Town of Brookhaven presents a family program, Birding by the Beach, at West Meadow Beach in East Setauket at 10 a.m. and at Cedar Beach in Mt. Sinai at 2 p.m. With their varied marine environments of shoreline, coastal trees and shrubs, and salt marsh grasses, these peninsulas provide year-round homes, breeding opportunities and migratory habitat for a number of bird species. Bring binoculars and wear comfortable shoes in a quest to observe many of our fine feathered friends. Free but registration required by emailing [email protected].

ELIQG Quilt Show

Hallockville Museum Farm, 6038 Sound Ave., Riverhead hosts the Eastern Long Island Quilters’ Guild annual show, “Hopes and Dreams,” today from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. and Aug. 25 from 10 a.m. to 2 p.m. with quilt displays, vendors, exhibits, yard sale featuring fabrics and notions, and raffle baskets. $5 adults, free for children. 631-871-7261, eliqg.com

Art League Open House

Art League of Long Island, 107 East Deer Park Road, Dix Hills kicks off its latest Instructors Exhibit with an open house and artists’ reception in the Jeanie Tengelsen Gallery from 11 a.m. to 2 p.m. Visitors will be treated to live demonstrations in specialized studios in a variety of mediums, which may include watercolor painting, oil painting, pottery, jewelry making, photography, and more. Free. 631-462-5400.

Farmingville Community Day

Join the Farmingville Residents Association for its annual Farmingville Community Day at Triangle Park, corner of Horseblock Road and Woodycrest Drive on Aug. 24 from 3 to 7 p.m. Enjoy food, entertainment, activities for kids, petting zoo, a bounce house, and more. Held rain or shine. Free. 631-260-7411, farmingvilleresidents.org

LIMEHOF Induction Ceremony

The Long Island Music and Entertainment Hall of Fame (LIMEHOF), 97 Main St., Stony Brook will induct legendary hip-hop artists Davy DMX (Run-DMC, Kurtis Blow, The Fat Boys), DJ Hurricane (The Beastie Boys) and DJ Jazzy Jay (Def Jam) at 7:30 p.m. The event will include a concert by all three inductees and DJ Johnny Juice (Public Enemy). Hip Hop Legend and LIMEHOF inductee Kurtis Blow will also be making a special appearance to induct Davy DMX. This event is free with advanced online registration only at limusichalloffame.org.

Long Island Comedy Festival

Theatre Three, 412 Main St., Port Jefferson closes out the 18th annual Long Island Comedy Festival tonight at 8 p.m. with  comedians Jack Cloonan, Joseph Anthony, Kevin Bartini, Tim Krompier and a special surprise guest. Tickets are $65. To order, call 631-928-9100 or visit theatrethree.com.

Sunday August 25

Port Jefferson Greek Festival

See Aug. 22 listing.

Holbrook Carnival

See Aug. 22 listing.

ELIQG Quilt Show

See Aug. 24 listing.

Lions Club Car Show

The Fabulous 50s & 60s Car Club presents the Northport Centerport Lions Club’s 59th annual Robert J. Bohaty Classic Car Show at Heckscher Park’s Ball Field, 11 Prime Ave., Huntington from 9 a.m. to 3 p.m. $5 admission for spectators. 631-241-3096

Nesconset Day

Join the Nesconset Chamber of Commerce for Nesconset Day along Smithtown Blvd., Nesconset Plaza and the Nesconset Gazebo from 10 a.m. to 5 p.m.  The street fair will feature vendors, crafts, music, games, food trucks, face painting, bounce houses, free giveaways and much more. 631-672-5197, nesconsetchamber.org.

CSHL Walking Tour

Cold Spring Harbor Laboratory, 1 Bungtown Road, Cold Spring Harbor will host a guided walking tour of the campus from 10 a.m. to 11:30 a.m. Learn about the historic and modern architecture, the Nobel legacy, and the advanced cancer, neuroscience, and plant research taking place at the lab. Fee is $7.18 per person. To register, visit www.cshl.edu. 516-367-8844

Thai Fair

Vajiradhammapadip Temple, 110 Rustic Road, Centereach will host a Thai Fair from 9 a.m. to 6 p.m. with a Thai music and dance show at 12:30 p.m. Admission is $5 for adults, children 12 and under are free. For more information, call 631-471-8006.

Joe Piket & The Storm in concert

The Long Island Music and Entertainment Hall of Fame, 97 Main St., Stony Brook  presents a concert by Joe Piket & The Storm from 3 to 4 p.m. The event is free with general admission ticket purchase. 631-689-5888, limusichalloffame.org. 

Wind Down Sundays

The popular summer concert series returns to Hap’s historic Red Barn at Frank Melville Memorial Park, 1 Old Field Road, Setauket with a performance by One Step Ahead at 5:30 p.m. Bring seating. 631-689-6146, frankmelvillepark.org

Hooch and the Bluesicians in Concert

Celebrate St. James continues its summer concert series at Celebrate Park, 369 Lake Ave., St. James with Hooch and the Bluesicians from 6 p.m. to 9 p.m. Free. Bring seating. 631-984-0201

Monday August 26

DIVAS3 in Concert

The John W. Engeman Theater, 250 Main St., Northport continues its Special Event Series with a concert by DIVAS3 at 8 p.m. Three female singers with powerhouse voices sing the biggest hits of the greatest divas in music history. Spanning four decades of chart-topping hits, DIVAS3 covers the 1960s through the 1990s with music by Aretha Franklin, Carole King, Celine Dion, Whitney Houston, Cher, Dolly Parton, Donna Summer, ABBA, and many more. Tickets are $45. To order, call 631-261-2900 or visit engemantheater.com.

Tuesday August 27

NSJC Social Club event

North Shore Jewish Center Social Club, 385 Old Town Road, Port Jefferson Station invites the community to meet Rev Marie D’Andrea, the Budapest Psychic who will impress you with her knowledge of the spiritual and psychic fields, in the Social Hall at 11 a.m. Discover these amazing worlds and how they connect with each other. Bagels, cream cheese and coffee will be served. $5 per person, $4 members. 631-928-3737

Nature Photography Workshop

Frank Melville Memorial Park, 1 Old Field Road, Setauket concludes its free summer programs with a Nature Photography Workshop at 11 a.m. Do you like to take pictures of the many animals you see in the park and around Long Island? Expert photographer Joe Kelly will share his knowledge and some useful tips. Meet at Hap’s Red Barn. Bring seating. Free. No registration required. 631-689-6146

Concerts at The Gazebo 

Tuesday night concerts at The Gazebo, 127 Smithtown Blvd., Nesconset conclude tonight with Panic! (Dance Rock Tribute) at 7 p.m. Rain date is the next day. 631-672-5197, nesconsetchamber.org

Wednesday August 28

Cruise Night at The Shoppes

The Shoppes at East Wind, 5720 Route 25A, Wading River hosts a Cruise Night Car Show every Wednesday through October from 5 to 9 p.m. Visit the Shoppes, enjoy a bite to eat and then check out the fine array of classic cars in the parking lot. 631-929-3500

Port Jefferson Sunset Concert

Port Jefferson Arts Council continues its Sunset Concert series at Harborfront Park, 101-A East Broadway, Port Jefferson with a performance by Gene Casey & The Lone Sharks from 6:30 to 8 p.m. Free. Bring seating. Held rain or shine. 631-473-5220

Summerfest Concert

The Northport Chamber of Commerce continues its Summerfest Concert series on Wednesday nights at the Robert Krueger Bandshell in Northport Village Park with The 90s Band from 7:30 to 9 p.m. Bring seating. 631-754-3905

Thursday August 29

An Evening of Jazz

The Jazz Loft, 275 Christian Ave., Stony Brook presents a concert by the Interplay Jazz Orchestra at 7 p.m. The 17-piece orchestra performs original compositions and arrangements written by band members. Tickets are $30 adults, $25 seniors, $20 students, $15 children, free for children ages 5 and under. thejazzloft.org

Film

All Night Horror Marathon

Retro Picture Show hosts the 2024 All Night Horror-thon at the Cinema Arts Centre, 423 Park Ave., Huntington on Aug. 24 starting at 8 p.m. Line-up includes The Wraith, The Blob, Fright Night, Dolls, and Demons. Tickets are $60. To order in advance, visit cinemaartscentre.org.

Theater

‘Legally Blonde The Musical’

Extended! The John W. Engeman Theater, 250 Main St., Northport presents Legally Blonde The Musical from July 11 to Sept 1. Elle Woods appears to have it all until her life is turned upside down when her boyfriend dumps her to attend Harvard. Determined to get him back, Elle charms her way into the prestigious law school. An award-winning musical based on the adored movie, the show follows the transformation of Elle Woods as she tackles stereotypes and scandal in pursuit of her dreams. Tickets range from $80 to  $95. To order, call 631-261-2900 or visit engemantheater.com. 

‘King Lear’

The Carriage House Players at the Suffolk County Vanderbilt Museum in  Centerport closes their 35th annual Shakespeare in the Courtyard Festival with King Lear from Aug. 16 to Sept. 8. Performances are held on the Vanderbilt mansion courtyard stage on Wednesdays and Fridays at 8 p.m. and Sundays at 7 p.m. Tickets are $20 adults, $15 seniors and children under age 12 at vanderbiltmuseum.org. 

‘Guys and Dolls’

Celebrate St. James presents a production of the musical Guys and Dolls at St. James Episcopal Church (Mills Hall), 490 North Country Road, St. James on Aug. 23 and 24 at 8 p.m. The show takes us from the bustle of Times Square to the dance clubs of Havana to the sewers of New York City as it demonstrates the great lengths to which a guy will go when he truly falls in love with a “doll.” Tickets, which include refreshments and dessert, are $35 adults, $30 seniors. To order, call 516-272-6597 or visit www.celebratestjames.org. 

Class Reunion

Port Jefferson High School Class of 1964 will hold its 60th reunion at the Meadow Club, 1147 Route 112, Port Jefferson Station on Oct. 17. Members of the Class of 1963 are invited to join them. For more information, email Mike Whelen at [email protected]

CALENDAR DEADLINE  is Wednesday at noon, one week before publication. Items may be mailed to: Times Beacon Record News Media, P.O. Box 707, Setauket, NY 11733. Email your information about community events to [email protected]. Calendar listings are for not-for-profit organizations (nonsectarian, nonpartisan events) only, on a space-available basis. Please include a phone number that can be printed.

 

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Pixabay photo

By Daniel Dunaief

Daniel Dunaief

Fear sells. It’s as true when companies are urging people to buy products to protect themselves, families, homes and cars as it is when politicians are trying to scare you  into voting for them or, just as importantly, voting against their opponent.

Sure, they make some effort to suggest that their policies will help you, but they spend considerably more time showing unnerving images of what might happen if you vote for the other team.

One side suggests that a vote for the other candidate could mean the end of democracy, elections and a host of freedoms, while the other suggests that a vote for the other side could mean an end to the world.

Whatever you believe, we have clearly reached an extreme of brinkmanship. 

On top of that, the news is filled with stories and images of murder and mayhem.

These days, all you need to do is turn on your phone and someone, somewhere, is struggling, threatened, or dying.

On top of that, people are sharing concerns about existential threats to the future, with global warming and declines in the food and water necessary to sustain the population.

Regardless of where people check in with the information of the day, threats lurk around every corner.

It’s no wonder that mental health has declined. The world is a place with dark shadows and horrifying possibilities.

Happily ever after has become the launching pad for fractured fairy tales, where couples can’t find affordable homes and, even if they did, couldn’t carry the mortgage.

This mental health strain and the difficulty of disconnecting from a phone that shares these bad news bulletins in constant alerts may be contributing to the record low fertility rate for the country reported this spring in the National Center for Health Statistics at the CDC. 

Specifically, the rates declined for women aged 20 to 39, hitting a record low for women between 20 and 24.

There are numerous other reasons people are foregoing the spectacularly rewarding and challenging decision to have children. Yes, men and women are pursuing careers.

And, yes, people may be more confident and comfortable having children later, putting off the life-altering decision until after a set of vacations, a work milestone or other goals.

But to know exactly why any one or group of people are making the decisions they do requires more than statistics or even surveys. When people answer questions in a survey, they sometimes offer the kinds of replies that look good or that the questioner expects.

I spoke anecdotally with a few 50’ish parents and some children around 30 and got a range of responses about the decision to have or not have children.

Both sides suggested that developing careers made it tougher to start a family. Parents, some of whom seemed eager to have grandchildren, expressed some frustration and, perhaps, judgement, about the decisions of their children and step-children.

Some of the younger crowd said their friends didn’t receive much parenting help from their partners, making the task of raising children more difficult and exhausting and dissuading them and their friends.

They also shared concerns about the high cost of raising children.

One of the younger set added that her mother had been dealing with a lifelong illness and that she had caretaking responsibilities from the time she was young. Her mother continues to need medical and family attention, which she said has made caring for a child less appealing.

One of the younger set asked me what I thought about being a parent. It has filled me with unbelievable joy, affection, love, and laughter and has helped me understand my own parents and grandparents better. Of course, we’ve had our share of challenges interspersed with stomach dropping moments.

Not to blame the media entirely, as I work and live inside that profession, but I feel like the nonstop stream of information, stories, videos, and social media shaming has left people feeling vulnerable and exhausted.

Parenting requires energy and optimism. When people lose sleep, they don’t have much energy and, if they look at their phones, they risk losing their hold on optimism. 

If we want to encourage this generation to continue the chain, we should let them know when they’re ready and when they ask, about the amazing and fulfilling moments, large and small, that make parenting the role of a lifetime.

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Pixabay photo

By Leah S. Dunaief

Leah Dunaief,
Publisher

Maine is a beautiful state. It is also a long drive from my house, as we knew before we started the drive. We were heading to a wedding in the Camden area, and the nice thing about going by car was that we didn’t have to fit all the special clothes into a suitcase. We could just hang them up in the back seat, put a few basics into a small suitcase, and we were off.

This was to be a unique wedding in our experience: no ceremony. We were going to party all weekend with relatives and dear friends and a bride and groom that had married the week before.

Guests came from all over the United States to party. They came from the northwest states, the Rockies, the Midwest and the South to wish this modern couple well and witness a truly modern event.

It began with invitations via email. When you consider that traditional snail mail wedding invitations from save-the-date to breakfast the day after run a couple about to tie the knot an average of $530, this was a clever cost-saving move. It should be said, though, that this couple is not average.

For one, they are 36 years old, late to the party, which averages 29 for the groom and 27 for the bride nationally. So they have learned a thing or two about wedding costs.

Second, she is an event planner and was able to put her considerable experience helping other couples spend their money to saving for a leaner wedding, notwithstanding the guest list of some 140.

While we did not witness the solemn event during which they would pledge their everlasting love, we did hear remarks from the siblings, cousin, mother and father of the groom, mother and father of the bride in a kind of spontaneous fashion rather than according to ritualistic assignments. We didn’t know who was to speak next until they gave their prepared remarks.

The setting along the shore was both bucolic and rustic. Indoor activities, like dancing and hors d’œuvres, were in a barn-like structure that boasted chandeliers. The building was set on a long, grassy lawn that led to the beach, and guests enjoyed walking its length to the water and, since it was early evening, watching the sun set.

Dress, as you might have guessed, was Maine Cocktail. Many of the men wore trousers and sports jackets. Not many of the younger men wore suits. The women‘s attire was varied, from long dresses to cocktail length and pants, mostly adorned with flowered patterns and lots of summer colors.

The food was as varied as the dress. Appetizers included pastrami knishes, egg roll hot dogs and crab Rangoon. The Maine course included a buffet, offering brisket, mac and cheese, BBQ chicken, a vegetarian dish and copious salad —  all happy food.

As original as this wedding may sound, it is something of a trend today. Just as dating apps and zoom weddings have become accepted, so have text message and email invites joined the era of digital romance. It is all part of a post-pandemic culture shift toward more casual gatherings. Some folks like it better. As Vogue magazine wrote, “The non-wedding wedding with less traditional clothing, casual food and spontaneous photography are growing in popularity.” 

And of course, this movement is prompted by increasing wedding costs. This more relaxed type of wedding is more affordable than the traditional highly structured wedding of yore. And a lot of fun.

PS: I thank Jeff Crilley, who publishes digitally “The Rundown” for journalists, for sharing the above observations.

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Photo courtesy of LIGMC
Photo courtesy of LIGMC
Photo courtesy of LIGMC

The Long Island Gay Men’s Chorus has announced the start of rehearsals for its Holiday 2024 concert series.

Weekly rehearsals begin at 7 p.m. on Wednesday, Sept. 4 at St. Paul’s Lutheran Church, 120 Vernon Valley Road in East Northport, leading up to a Sunday, Oct. 27 afternoon fall cabaret and concerts on Sunday, Dec. 8, Friday, Dec. 13 and Saturday, Dec. 14.

Whether you come from community theater or karaoke or somewhere in between, there’s a place for you in LIGMC welcomes all who can commit to weekly rehearsals, learning the music, and having fun as we put on a great show with some wonderful folks.

Interested singers can follow LIGMC on Instagram and Facebook or contact LIGMC’s board of directors at [email protected] with for more info.

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Do you recognize this man? Photo from SCPD

Suffolk County Crime Stoppers and Suffolk County Police Sixth Precinct Crime Section officers are seeking the public’s help to identify and locate a man who allegedly stole from a parked car in Selden this month.

A man allegedly stole a Dewalt saw from the bed of a pickup truck in a parking lot, located at 401 Independence Plaza, at approximately 12:40 p.m. on August 1. The man left the scene in a white work van.

Suffolk County Crime Stoppers offers a cash reward for information that leads to an arrest. Anyone with information about these incidents can contact Suffolk County Crime Stoppers to submit an anonymous tip by calling 1-800-220-TIPS, utilizing a mobile app which can be downloaded through the App Store or Google Play by searching P3 Tips, or online at www.P3Tips.com. All calls, text messages and emails will be kept confidential.

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