Yearly Archives: 2018

The cover of Karol's book

By Donna Newman

One of the certainties of life is that, unless one departs first, sooner or later each of us will have to deal with the death of a loved one.

Among his many duties as a spiritual leader, Stephen Karol, now Rabbi Emeritus at Temple Isaiah in Stony Brook, has ministered to the bereaved. He has officiated at funerals, counseled families and helped people navigate the mourning period that begins upon a death and continues through memorial services throughout the ensuing years.

Rabbi Karol has gathered a series of memorial sermons into a book titled, “Finding Hope and Faith in the Face of Death” and subtitled, “Insights of a Rabbi and Mourner.”

Author Stephen Karol

What motivated you to write this book?

I decided to do it for a couple of reasons. First, I’ve gotten really good feedback on my Yizkor (memorial) sermons. People have asked for copies and that sort of thing. And, throughout my career officiating at funerals, I just think people need comforting, hopeful messages to help them cope with death. That’s what this book provides.

Is this a ‘Jewish’ book, or do you feel it has broader appeal?

The book is written primarily for Jews, but not exclusively. While I speak from a Jewish context, a lot of what I have to say in these messages can be applied to people who are Jewish or not, religious or not, whatever they may be.

Why publish it now?

As a congregational rabbi I was devoted to my congregants — and happily so — and didn’t have the time to write a book. Now, in retirement, I decided to share my words of comfort. And when I submitted my proposal to the publisher (Wipf and Stock), they loved my idea and enthusiastically agreed to publish it under their Cascade Books imprint.

What was the most challenging part of compiling the manuscript?

In creating the introduction to the book, I wanted to be honest. I had to confess that, despite my faith in life after death, I am afraid to die. So, I describe my fear and explain how it materialized at a particularly happy time in my life, shortly after my daughter’s birth. I tell about the ways I’ve learned to cope with it and describe how a combination of hope and faith have helped me not only as an individual but also as a rabbi. That’s why I think my words can be universal, because you don’t have to be a rabbi to believe what I believe, and to feel and think what I feel and think.

How did you choose the sermon that became Chapter 1?

The first chapter in the book was chosen because it dealt with a personal loss. I titled it, “Accompanying the Dead” and it begins: “My uncle Harry died last month.” I talk about the experience of being in my uncle’s hospital room with him when he died, and officiating — along with my brother who is also a rabbi — at his funeral. A good number of the chapters involve personal experiences.

The cover of Karol’s book.

Aside from your own personal losses over the years, did other experiences contribute to your understanding of life and death?

I suffered a heart attack in 1995 that gave me a greater sense of perspective. One of the messages in the book is that we need to value life and make every day count. We need to tell people that we love them whenever we can.

How long was this book in the making?

The book consists of 16 sermons that I have given both at Temple Isaiah and at Congregation Sha’aray Shalom in Hingham, Massachusetts, over the course of my tenures at both synagogues. So, when people ask me how long it took to write the book, tongue in cheek I say: 35 years.

“Finding Hope and Faith in the Face of Death” is currently available for purchase on Amazon, Kindle and Ingram. Meet Rabbi Karol at a book talk and signing on June 24 at Temple Isaiah, 1404 Stony Brook Road, Stony Brook from 5 to 7 p.m.; or at a book signing on June 28 at Barnes & Noble at the Smith Haven Mall in Lake Grove from 7 to 9 p.m.

‘Big Sibling’ by Michael Danielson

‘You don’t take a photograph. You make it’— Ansel Adams

By Heidi Sutton

Gurwin Jewish Nursing & Rehabilitation Center in Commack hosted an award ceremony for its annual Photo Contest last Thursday evening. The event, which was held in the center’s Simon Rainbow Room, celebrated 25 years of bringing beautiful photos to their residents and featured a slide show of the winning selections from this and previous years.

‘Indigo’ by Stan Mehlman

Generously sponsored by the Tiffen Company for the 12th year in a row, this year’s competition drew over 700 entries from amateur photographers across the country. Of those submissions, 47 photos were chosen to be enlarged, framed and hung on permanent display for the enjoyment of the residents, staff, visitors and volunteers.

“It’s hard to believe we’ve been doing this for a quarter of a century,” said Dennine W. Cook, public relations director at Gurwin, who came up with the initial idea in 1993 as a way of “making [Gurwin’s] bare walls worthy of a smile.” According to Cook, in its infancy, the contest had two categories — color and black and white — with less than 100 entries. The annual event has since expanded to offer 12 categories including Nature, Long Island/New York, Travel, Still Life and the ever popular Pets, Children and Nature. “Needless to say, we’ve come a long way,” she said.

Addressing the photographers in the audience, Cook said, “[At Gurwin] our mission … is to provide the highest quality of care to our residents while also providing them the very best quality of life. And that’s where all of you come in.”

She continued, “This contest … is different from any other contest you might enter. Sure there are winners … and there are prizes, but that’s where the similarities end.” Cook went on to explain that each year’s winners are displayed permanently for the enjoyment of the residents, first in the center’s Helen and Nat Tiffen Gallery and then up to the resident units to make space for the current year’s winners.

‘Popping Bubbles’ by Donna Crinnian

The public relations director went on to speak of the profound impact these beautiful images have made on residents of the 460-bed facility. She spoke of Faith who loves to look at photos of babies. “The babies, it seems, make her smile the most and so we move the [baby pictures] to Faith’s unit.” She spoke of Len, who is visited each day by his wife. “Together they stroll the halls, stopping to admire a photo that catches their eye. They may go the same way each day but they find something new to discuss every time.”

While the original 8- by 10-inch submissions will not be returned, Cook assured guests that all of them will be put to good use. “Each photo … is given to our recreation departments in our nursing homes, assisted living and day care programs to be used for all kinds of projects all year long.” Whether they become inspiration for a painting, part of a collage or even placed at the doorway of a resident’s room, “they have a much higher purpose.

This year’s judges, James Dooley (former Director of Photography for Newsday and Administrator of the Alexia Foundation), Susan Dooley (Emeritus Chair of the Art Department at Nassau Community College and member of fotofoto gallery of Huntington) and Tony Lopez (Tony Lopez Photography), were tasked with choosing a grand prize winner along with honorable mentions for each category as well as Best in Show, which this year was awarded to Kathleen Hinkaty of  Huntington for her playful piece, “Diaper Races.”

‘Diaper Races’ by Kathleen Hinkaty

In addition, Gurwin’s resident judges Nancy and Trudy selected five of their favorites to be honored. According to Cook, “They poured over the photos … considering not only their own preferences but also what they thought others would appreciate.”

“Although this contest is a great achievement for you as a photographer, it’s really about the people who get to see your work once it is chosen,” explained Cook.

President and CEO of Gurwin Family of Healthcare Services Stuart B. Almer agreed, stating, “We always enjoy this particular event,” sharing that when he gives tours of the facility, “everyone always stops to admire the photos. This is not just a once-a-year event — this is a 365-day-a-year event,” he stressed, thanking the photographers for their contribution.

 “All of the selections will be judged, discussed and enjoyed by so many appreciative eyes for years to come and to me that is the real honor — that your photos will hang for decades in our resident’s home,” said Cook. “These photos make all the difference in the world.”

Entries for next year’s Photo Contest will be accepted between Feb. 15 and April 15, 2019. Visit  www.gurwin.org/about/photo-contest to see more of this year’s winners.

All photos courtesy of Gurwin Jewish

The Comsewogue High School Class of 2018 said its goodbyes June 21 at the annual graduation ceremony June 21 on the football field. Valedictorian Luke Begley and Salutatorian Charles Clark addressed the crowd in attendance and the class of nearly 300.

Smithtown West’s most recent graduates celebrated the sweet success of finishing four years of hard work.

Smithtown High School West held its 103rd annual commencement ceremony June 21 at 5 p.m. on the football field. The ceremony featured addresses by honor speakers Kevin Camson and Jenna Curcio. The seniors in the school’s concert choir and jazz choir performed “The Sweetest Days” as a tribute to their parents and fellow graduates.

File photo by Victoria Espinoza

Suffolk County police 6th Squad detectives are investigating a three-car crash that seriously injured a woman last night in Holtsville.

Richard Sougstad, 33, of Coram, was driving a 2012 Dodge Ram eastbound on the Long Island Expressway, approximately 1,000 feet west of exit 63, when he allegedly attempted to change lanes and crashed into a 2003 Hyundai Sonata driven by John Capuano, at approximately 7:15 p.m. The crash caused the Dodge to overturn. The Hyundai then struck a 1998 Nissan Maxima driven by Capuano’s son Christopher. Christopher Capuano then drove the Maxima to a parking lot at a nearby hotel.

Linda Capuano, 54, of Astoria, Queens, a passenger in the Hyundai, suffered serious injuries. Her husband John Capuano, 53, also of Astoria, sustained non-life-threatening injuries. Sougstad also sustained non-life-threatening injuries. A 2-year-old female passenger in the Dodge sustained minor injuries. All of the victims were transported to Stony Brook University Hospital. Christopher Capuano, 31, of Medford, was not injured.

The investigation is ongoing. Detectives are asking anyone with information about the crash to call the 6th Squad at 631-854-8652.

 

Hundreds of Kings Park graduates are confidentially marching off to college and their future.

The Kings Park school district held its annual commencement ceremony June 21 for the Class of 2018 at 6:30 p.m.  Joining the more than 300 graduates was Kings Park High School Principal Lino Bracco, who is retiring from the district this year. He was given a standing ovation for his service and dedication to the students.

Stock photo

The next couple of months are packed with celebrations, including high school and college proms and graduations. When planning any outdoor festivities, PSEG Long Island urges customers to think carefully
about how they handle Mylar balloons. Though they can make a party more festive, Mylar balloons can also cause power outages when they get loose and come in contact with electrical equipment.

The distinctive metallic coating on Mylar balloons conducts electricity. Because of this, when a Mylar balloon comes in contact with a power line, it can cause a short circuit. This short circuit can lead to power outages, fires and possible injuries.

To reduce the risk of outages and injuries, residents should keep the following safety tips in mind:

• Mylar balloons and other decorations should be kept away from overhead power lines and all utility equipment.

• Make sure balloons are secured to a weight that is heavy enough to prevent them from floating away. Keep balloons tethered and attached to the weights at all times.

• Always dispose of Mylar balloons by safely puncturing the balloon in several places to release the helium that otherwise could cause the balloon to float away.

• Never touch a power line. Do not attempt to retrieve a balloon, toy or other type of debris that is entangled in an overhead power line. Call PSEG Long Island to report the problem at 800-490-0075 so crews can remove the item safely.

For more kite and balloon safety tips visit PSEG’s website.

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A 1780 map depicts Long Island during Revolutionary War times. Image from the Library of Congress

By Beverly C. Tyler

As we prepare to celebrate Independence Day, July 4, it is fitting to reflect on the actions of some of the men and women who helped win our independence.

The Revolutionary War had a great effect on the residents of Long Island. After the Declaration of Independence was signed July 4, 1776, many Long Islanders, especially in Suffolk County, received it enthusiastically. Their enthusiasm was short-lived, however, for on Aug. 27, 1776, the British took possession of New York City, following the Battle of Long Island in Brooklyn, and with its possession of all of Long Island. The residents were to be under British control for the next seven years.

“Since my arrival at camp I have had as large an allowance of fighting as I could, in a serious mood, wish for.”

— Benjamin Tallmadge

A large number of Long Island Patriots fled to Connecticut and became refugees, giving up their lands, homes and most of their possessions. Those who stayed lived under often harsh, military rule. The residents were forced to provide whatever His Majesty’s forces needed. Cattle, feed, grains, food, wagons and horses, especially cordwood for fuel was taken, and in most cases, not paid for. Long Island was virtually stripped of its mature trees during the first three to five years of the war to supply lumber and fuel for New York City.

In addition to suffering at the hands of the British, many Long Islanders were also considered fair game by their former friends and neighbors in Connecticut who would cross the Sound to harass the British, steal supplies, destroy material the British might use and take captives. The captives were often taken in exchange for the Patriots captured by the British.

Benjamin Tallmadge, Gen. George Washington’s chief of intelligence from the summer of 1778 until the end of the Revolutionary War, was born and spent his youth in Setauket, Long Island. Following four years at Yale College in New Haven and a year teaching in Wethersfield, Connecticut, Tallmadge joined the Continental Army. He took an active part in the Battle of Brooklyn and progressed rapidly in rank. As a captain in the 2nd Regiment of Continental Light Dragoons — Washington’s first fast attack force mounted on horses — Tallmadge came under Washington’s notice. By December of 1776, Washington had asked Tallmadge, in addition to his dragoon responsibilities, to gather intelligence from various spies on Long Island. In 1777 Tallmadge coordinated and received intelligence from individual spies on Long Island. (See History Close at Hand article published in The Village Times Herald May 10 edition.)

To memorialize one of the Culper spies, a polychrome statue of Benjamin Tallmadge sits on the peak of the Setauket School gymnasium. Photo by Beverly C. Tyler

Tallmadge was promoted to the rank of major April 7, 1777. In June Tallmadge’s troop, composed entirely of dapple gray horses, left their base at Litchfield, Connecticut, and proceeded to New Jersey where Washington reviewed the detachment and complimented Tallmadge on the appearance of his horsemen.

Washington gave the troops of the 2nd Regiment little chance to rest after they came to headquarters, and Tallmadge wrote, “Since my arrival at camp I have had as large an allowance of fighting as I could, in a serious mood, wish for.”

In September and October, Tallmadge took part in the Battle of Germantown. In November of 1777, when the American army finally went into winter quarters at Valley Forge, Tallmadge was ordered, “with a respectable detachment of dragoons,” to act as an advance corps of observation.

During these maneuvers into the no-mans-land area between the American and British lines around Philadelphia, Tallmadge again engaged in obtaining intelligence of the enemy’s movements and plans.

In January of 1778, the 2nd Regiment of Light Dragoons was ordered to Trenton, New Jersey, where the other cavalry regiments were assembling to spend the winter. Throughout the spring, Tallmadge waited for action. In June the 2nd Regiment was assigned to take up a position in advance of the American lines near Dobbs Ferry. In July Washington returned to the Hudson Valley with most of his army. With the arrival of the French fleet under Count d’Estaing in July, the pressing need for organized military intelligence could no longer be avoided. Officers, and especially dragoon officers, were encouraged to find intelligent correspondents who could furnish reliable information to American headquarters.

During the summer of 1778, Tallmadge was able to establish, with Washington’s approval, a chain of American spies on Long Island and in New York, the now recognized Culper Spy Ring, feeding information through Setauket, across Long Island Sound to Fairfield, Connecticut, and by mounted dragoon to Washington’s headquarters. Despite Tallmadge’s important role in the formation of the spying operation, his duties as field officer of the 2nd Regiment took most of his time during the summer and fall of 1778. The men and women who made the spy ring function lived in constant danger in both British and Patriot territory. We owe them the greatest respect and honor we can offer, especially on July 4.

Beverly C. Tyler is Three Village Historical Society historian and author of books available from the society at 93 North Country Road, Setauket. For more information, call 631-751-3730 or visit www.tvhs.org.

The more than 400 newest graduates of Smithtown High School East are ready to take their place in the sun.

High School East held its 103rd annual Commencement exercises for the Class of 2018 June 21 on the football field. The ceremony featured two student speakers: Honor Speaker Matthew Timmel and a presentation by Nicole Cahill, the senior class president.

The senior class concert choir gave tribute to the graduates and their parents with a performance of “Here Comes the Sun” by George Harrison before caps were thrown skyward in celebration.

Click through the gallery above to see photos from High School East’s 2018 graduation ceremony.  TBR News Media gives our congratulations and best wishes to all of the graduates. 

Comsewogue High School students clean headstones at Calverton National Cemetery May 30 as part of Joe's Day of Service. Photo from CSD

Stories of Comsewogue School District students and staff engaging in acts of kindness are hardly rare, but an event conceived by a teacher and several students carried out May 30 somehow raised the bar.

High school teacher Andrew Harris said he thought of the idea of a full day of community service projects last school year, and in talking with some of his colleagues, a larger idea was born. By this school year, the event had a name — Joe’s Day of Service, after Superintendent Joe Rella — and students were making pitches in Harris’ class for how the student body should spend the day.

“There are major problems everywhere — addiction, depression — and the thing is, they say one of the best things to do is to help other people,” Harris said in an interview at Brookhaven Town Hall, where the students were recognized for their efforts by the town board June 14. “I wanted the students to understand that, because they don’t always have the opportunity. I wanted them to get a taste of that just in one day and understand that when you give to others you feel rich.”

Comsewogue Superintendent Joe Rella with students who participated in Joe’s Day of Service. Photo from CSD

Ninth-grade students Julia Ratkiewicz and Rachel Plunkett proposed the idea of visiting Calverton National Cemetery, where members of the United States armed forces are laid to rest, to spend the day cleaning gravestones. By May 30, nearly 200 Comsewogue High School students headed to the Calverton cemetery — on seven buses donated for use that day by Suffolk Transportation Service.

“I was in such a good mood, my mom asked, ‘Are you sure you were out cleaning gravestones?’” Julia said.

Rachel, who said she and Julia thought of the idea because they both have veterans in their family and wanted to show their appreciation, said she never imagined their small idea presented in class as a way to give back would turn into a districtwide day of service.

“It’s just the least we could do for them since they did so much for us,” she said.

Eleventh-grader John Quartararo, who also helped organize the trip, called his experience at the cemetery a beautiful day, and marveled at the mood and response from his classmates who participated on the trip.

While the high school students were at Calverton, other Comsewogue kids were at Save-A-Pet animal shelter in Port Jefferson Station, cleaning cages and spending time with the rescued animals. John F. Kennedy Middle School students visited Stony Brook University Hospital to sing in the lobby, then went over to the Long Island State Veterans Home on SBU’s campus to sing patriotic songs and spend time with the veterans living at the facility. Others collected toiletries to donate to the homeless. Some painted rocks as part of The Kindness Rocks Project, an initiative which calls on people to paint inspiring messages on rocks and leave them in places where they will be found by someone in need of a boost.

Comsewogue students are recognized during the June 14 Brookhaven Town board meeting. Photo by Alex Petroski

Local businesses even got wind of Joe’s Day of Service and contributed to the cause. Chick-fil-A, Wahlburgers, Bagelicious Café, Walmart, McDonald’s and Applebee’s Grill and Bar in Miller Place all offered support in one way or another.

Harris and the students involved each credited Rella for setting the tone at Comsewogue and in the community.

“All I did was go to the events and just get blown away at every single one,” Rella said. “It was an unbelievable show on the part of our students. I’m better for having been here. I’m a better person for just having been at Comsewogue. And that’s the way it is.”

Brookhaven Councilwoman Valerie Cartright (D-Port Jefferson Station) commended Harris and the students involved for their efforts.

“I think it’s important that we highlight all of these [acts] because on one day, they provided all of this service to our community, to those in need,” she said. “I just want to say thank you so much for all that you do, Comsewogue, and keep up the great work.”